Truth in Advertising?

I got a fit of the giggles when I saw this sign for the Feng Li Da Arts and Grafts Co. in the Xiangjiang Shopping Center in Xiamen. It was closed, so I can't tell you if it lives up to its name. But I really appreciated the warning!

Changes in Attitude

My classes have been fascinating for the last couple of weeks. In Constitutional Law, we have left behind the slightly dry “powers of government” material and are enmeshed in learning about constitutional guarantees of fundamental rights and individual liberties. It’s been illuminating to watch the students react to issues I know are controversial in China – premarital sex, gay and lesbian relationships, race relations, for instance. And it’s been particularly interesting to see some students espousing pretty liberal viewpoints on these issues. It seems that this new generation in China, like new generations everywhere, is rethinking some old ideas.

Particularly noteworthy was the day we studied Loving v. Virginia, where the Supreme Court held that it was unconstitutional to ban inter-racial marriage because of a fundamental right to marry, and Lawrence v. Texas, where the Supreme Court held that it was unconstitutional to criminalize gay sex.

The discussion of racism was almost amusing, since China takes the firm position that there is no racial discrimination in China. That’s a pretty easy position to take when you have a mostly homogeneous society. But, I asked, how about the various minority groups in China. Would it be considered a problem if a Han (the majority ethnic group) were to marry a Miao (a minority group)? No, they said, most of the minority groups are so assimilated that there are few distinctions made any more.

I asked the students whether inter-racial marriage was considered a problem, and they assured me that it was not. I asked how their parents would react if they were to marry a Caucasian person. The men said this would be no problem, and as they were talking I could see the women laughing and whispering to themselves. So I asked them how their parents would react, and they said their parents would see it as a big problem. They would worry that the children were not Chinese, and would not be raised to understand Chinese values.

This led to a great discussion about what it meant to be Chinese – was ethnicity enough, or did you have to have language and culture as well? (I told them about Zoe wanting to be Chinese, but feeling she was not Chinese since she didn’t know the language.) They were familiar with the words “bamboo” (Chinese on the outside, but hollow of culture on the inside) and “banana” (yellow on the outside, but white on the inside) as describing overseas Chinese. And they said there’s an equivalent expression for people raised in China who are white on the outside but Chinese on the inside – they are “egg.” I asked if “egg” and “banana” were really equivalent – was “egg” a compliment or an insult, was “banana” a compliment or an insult? They admitted that “egg” was a positive description while “banana” had definite negative connotations. (Don’t worry, all of this was actually relevant to the legal discussion, too – we had to talk about what it took to be “colored” under the anti-miscegenation laws).

China has a long history of intolerance of gay men and lesbians, so I was curious to hear my students’ reaction to the Lawrence case. I said that it was my understanding that most Chinese considered homosexuality to be wrong, and that some in America also consider it to be wrong. I also said that many in America who consider it wrong will say it is because of their religion or because they feel the Bible condemns it. What were the reasons people considered it wrong in China? A student said it was because of tradition and “family values.” And, he said, it was not natural, which is proven by the fact that no animals have sex with members of the same sex. Another student jumped in to say that in fact there are animals that will have homosexual sex, citing studies of sheep, monkeys and insects (I admit I didn’t expect the students to be quite so current on the topic!).

Yet another student jumped into the discussion to say that gay people should not be allowed to parent children because that would make their children gay. Two students rapidly protested, saying that no one could be persuaded to be gay if they were not and that being gay was a matter of biology. Another student disagreed, saying that it was family life that made someone gay. He said that if a boy is raised with many sisters, he will like girlish things and become gay. I said, “Well, then, I guess there will be no more gay people in China since no one has brothers or sisters anymore!”

One student piped up pretty early on in the discussion to say – and I’ll try to get this as close to verbatim as I can – “I know some homosexuals and they are very nice boys. They work hard and have high standards. I don’t see this as a problem. They should be able to do what they want.” I admit I never expected to hear this attitude expressed in China.

Women & Law has been fascinating, too. Here, the students are definitely grappling with old ideas – their parents’ ideas. As my Con Law students’ disparate reaction to the question about inter-racial marriage illustrated, parents exert more control over daughters than sons (or at least they try to!) My women students tell me that their parents arrange dates for them, that parents who have daughters will fix them up through their friends who have sons. And, they said, they really must have their parents’ approval to get married, which is why they agree to these dates.

Several commented wistfully that it isn’t possible for women to choose to be single in China. There is too much family pressure to get married, and women are still expected to live with their parents until they marry. The only way to avoid living with your parents until you are married is to work far away from the family home. Still, you are expected to spend weekends and holidays at the family home. So, they said, you really can’t have your own home and your own family until you marry.

Now this was the kind of traditional Chinese attitude that I was expecting to encounter. But what seems new to me is that the women students are definitely chafing under these restrictions. What will be interesting to see in the coming years is whether young Chinese women will manage to break free.

One of the biggest barriers, it seems, is financial. The reason you need your parents’ approval to marry is that if they don’t agree, you won’t be able to get financial help from them in the future when you are trying to buy a house or pay for a child’s education. And there is very much the perception that a young couple cannot succeed without that financial support from a parent. And one reason women live at home while they are single is that they are often financially unable to support themselves, even with advanced degrees like my students are getting. They tell me it is very difficult for young women to get jobs; employers assume you will be marrying soon and having a baby, and they don’t want to have to pay your maternity leave. So, this new generation – China’s future – is struggling with old attitudes, old strictures, trying to make space for new attitudes. I really hope I can keep in touch with my students – it will be fascinating to see where they are, how their attitudes have changed China in, say, 10 . . . 25 . . . 50 years.

Fulbright Deadline Coming Up

The deadline for the 2008-2009 Fulbright awards for China and Hong Kong is fast approaching -- it is August 1, 2007 (though sometimes the deadline gets extended). This has been such a fantastic experience for us I want to encourage everyone to check out the various awards and consider applying. And don't forget Hong Kong. As the Fulbright website says, "Hong Kong is a major gateway to China."

Bummer!

We were supposed to go to Shanghai at the end of this week for a conference on “Teaching American Law in Chinese Universities,” but the conference got cancelled at the last minute. It seems the conference couldn’t get the required approval from the Chinese Ministry of Higher Education. I don’t know why, whether it was just not being able to jump through the bureaucratic hoops or whether there was something distressing about the topics or speakers. But I’m sorry not to go. It would have been nice to meet again with the other four law Fulbrighters, and to meet with Chinese professors who are teaching American law in China.

And it also complicated Mimi’s travel plans. She made her return flight originate in Shanghai since that’s where we would be, so we had to scramble today to get her a ticket from Xiamen to Hong Kong instead, and we’re out an extra 960 yuan since her Shanghai-HK ticket can’t be changed. So that ticket is also a loss. And our 3 tickets to Shanghai may also be a loss – our waiban is trying to get us a refund, but no guarantees.

Being out 4,000 yuan on tickets to Shanghai is particularly maddening since the American/Hong Kong organizers told us to go ahead and book the tickets even though they had not yet gotten approval from the Ministry of Higher Education. Grrrrr.

One good thing is that we’ll be here for Children’s Day on June 1, and that’s when Zoe’s class is performing, as are other classes of older kids from the kindergarten, at the University auditorium (no need for clothing made from recyclables, instead we had to pay for a “costume,” which is just a denim skirt and t-shirt and thus “reclyclable” into every-day clothes!).

I guess I’ll just have to chalk up the financial loss to a lesson in Chinese bureaucracy – or perhaps the lesson is that even those with long-time experience with Chinese bureaucracy can underestimate it at times.

Around the Neighborhood

We had a fun-filled Sunday without ever leaving campus today. I’ve already told you about the style show; it was sandwiched in between lots of other fun.

The mom of one of Maya’s classmates invited us to their home Sunday morning for a play date. I don’t know how I would have managed without Chen Xing’s parents – they have kept me informed of what’s happening, have translated for me so I could communicate with Maya’s teacher, have helped me with my little English lessons for Maya’s class. So when Chen Xing’s mom invited us over at 8:30 (a play date at 8:30 in the morning?!) we eagerly accepted. Little did we know that the play date would last all morning and would include a wonderful lunch as well!

Walking through the park on the way to our play date we saw a group of retirees doing Tai Chi – I think I’ve already mentioned that parks throughout China are filled with elderly exercise mavens each morning. The park at Xiada is no exception.

Chen Xing’s family lives in an older apartment building near the kindergarten, in a second-floor apartment. We were told that the 3-bedroom apartment was 64 square meters, which is about 690 square feet. Chen Xing’s parents were very gracious, and offered us fruit and drink as soon as we walked in the door.

Soon the girls – including another friend of Chen Xing’s – were all playing together. (The bed made a great place to play, since it took up most of the available space in Chen Xing’s bedroom.)

Mimi and I chatted with Chen Xing’s dad – he had asked me to read a mathematics paper he had written in English, so we talked about my editing suggestions (I couldn’t offer much help, since the math part might as well have been in Chinese for all I understood it! And the English was impeccably correct, so my suggestions were purely stylistic). Soon he left because he had to go meet people at the airport who were coming to Xiada for a mathematics conference. We then talked with Chen Xing’s mom, but she also spent time in the kitchen and would not accept our offers of help!

She prepared us a wonderful lunch with a pork and mushroom dish, cauliflower and beef, steamed fish, an egg and tomato dish, Chinese spinach, soup, and of course, rice. It was all delicious, though she modestly told us she did not cook well! As you can see, Zoe and Maya heartily disagreed with her assessment!

It was great fun seeing how another family in China lives. Their apartment was much more modest than Si Bo’s family’s abode – perhaps that reflects a difference in salary between mathematics professors and law professors! It’s clear that Chen Xing is the proverbial apple of their eye and what resources they have go to her. When they decided to install an air conditioner in the apartment, it went in her bedroom. Her bedroom had a fancy bedroom suite, including a huge armoire, while her parents’ room was more piece-meal. She takes dance classes on Saturday afternoons and English classes on Sunday afternoons. They download English songs on the computer so she can learn, and the family computer is in her room. She had English and Chinese DVDs and books, and her little pink tutu was hanging with the laundry on the balcony. She had books on drawing, as well as arts and crafts supplies, and books on mathematics (no surprise there!). And she had lots and lots of toys. The girls had a ball exploring all of her things!

Having spent the entire morning at Chen Xing’s house, we left soon after lunch so that we could all get ready for the fashion show. I’m sure you recognized Chen Xing in the pictures from the fashion show, too. Here’s another:

Aren’t they cute together? We’ve been so lucky that Chen Xing is in Maya’s class!

After the fashion show, we played for a little while in the park (mostly so Mimi and I could sit in the shade and cool down!). Zoe and Maya looked so cute that Mimi couldn’t resist having a photo shoot as we walked home. The girls love their little tiaras (which are very popular here with children and adults alike) and want to wear them all the time! And the umbrellas were for shade today, not for rain.

Ours was not the only photo shoot in the park – we came across this bride and groom having wedding photos taken.

We often see such photo shoots as we are out and about – wedding photography is a big business here. And we’ve yet to see a groom in a black tux – they all seem to want to match the bride’s dress. At every mall and on Zhongshan Lu there are representatives from wedding photographers set up with dozens of intimate tables at which couples can look at sample books or laptop computers, and every couple who walks by is dragooned into the area to look.

Right across the street from our apartment is an old courtyard-style house, and we often see an old lady sitting in a chair in front. She always smiles at the girls and waves, and when I pass by without the girls she asks about them (Chinese, hand gestures, I’m pretty sure that’s what she’s asking!). She was especially excited to see the girls all dressed up today and gestured us over.

It’s a little hard to have a conversation, but she pointed at the girls and said “jei jei” and “mei mei” (big sister, little sister)? I said yes, and then pointed at myself and said “mama.” She said something excitedly and clapped her hands, and then I pointed at Mimi and said “nai nai” (grandmother), and she was even more excited and clapped and gave a thumb’s up. It was a very affirming encounter, and I’m really glad we stopped to “talk!” One of my biggest regrets in not speaking Chinese is not being about to speak with the older people here. Many younger Chinese speak English, but I’ve found it rare in people over 60. And I really appreciate the fact that there are old people, children, young adults and the middle aged all living together on campus. It really makes the college campus seem like a community, a small village within the larger city of Xiamen. The campus is truly our neighborhood, chock full of intriguing experiences. Today was a great example of that!

On the Catwalk Redux

Remember the kids on the playground practicing their modeling moves? We had no idea why the afternoon exercises at school suddenly looked like an “I’m too sexy for my shirt” video? Well, a few days later the mystery was solved – Chen Xing’s dad explained that there was to be a fashion show, and the kids were to wear clothing made of “useless things.” It was an exercise in recycling! (I admit to being geeky enough to be thrilled there was actually an educative motive behind the whole thing!).

So we made Maya an outfit out of plastic bags, dried rose petals from Mimi’s birthday bouquet, paper scraps, the plastic container inside a cracker box (makes a cunning clamshell purse!), an old shoelace, and a cup-a-noodle container as a hat! Maya looked adorable!

And to add to the fun, the fashion show was on the outdoor stage in front of the administration building. I think it was actually sponsored by some company, and it involved not just the kids in Maya’s class, but all the classes of the younger kids and the even younger kids who go to the nursery school on campus (we’re told that the older kids, including Zoe’s class, will be having their fashion show in a few weeks).

Some of the parents really went all-out on the costumes, and some seemed to have very little in the way of recycled products, but all the kids were really cute. Look at the little girl in the middle – her skirt is a KFC chicken container – how clever is that?!

And remember the little girl who practically sprained something with her hip swings? Here she is in full regalia – and the girl next to her reminds me of a 1960s aluminum Christmas tree:

And here’s our pro striking a pose with the James Bond boys! I love the costume of the boy on the right – full gladiator kit out of a gift bag!

And then the cutest model in the show – our own recycling Maya! (Almost all the kids had red dots on their foreheads – a Chinese custom for good fortune.)

And then after taking her turn on the catwalk, finishing off with a curtsey, off Maya goes with hands on what one day may be hips!

There were tons of kids and tons of parents and tons of relatives watching, all of us stewing under full sun with no shade in sight. (I’m not sure whose brilliant idea it was to hold this fashion extravaganza at 4 in the afternoon when temperatures were guaranteed to be in the 90s.) Poor Maya sweltered in her plastic dress like a bagged roast in an oven! Still, she said she had a lot of fun. And just think, we get to do it all over again for Zoe! (any suggestions for a recycled costume would be much appreciated!).

10,000 Rock Botanic Garden

We finally made it to the Botanic Gardens in Xiamen, and it was well worth it. The garden is huge and I don’t think we saw half of it, though we walked and walked and walked. Of course we had to climb the bridge and go down those %^&* stairs! Here are the girls in the bamboo garden right across the bridge.

And here’s a close-up of the bamboo so you can see that the strange markings are from Chinese grafitti -- I guess there is no place in the world immune from grafitti.

As befits a botanic garden, the flowers were gorgeous and plentiful. Look to the left of the cluster of flowers below and you can see a black bumble bee caught in mid-air!

The lotus in the botanic gardens were even more beautiful than those at Nanputuo.

I’m glad my camera caught the sparkling dew drops on this hibiscus. Or maybe it wasn’t dew – it was so hot, it’s possible that even the flowers were sweating!

Malinda says this flower makes her think of a Georgia O’Keefe painting – and we all know what those are paintings of!

Even the trash cans got into the spirit of the gardens and were made of fake trees and bamboo. The girls got a real kick out of those.

It was so hot that we had to stop many times and replenish our water intake (we found out after we got home that the heat index this morning was 102 degrees!). I seldom perspire, but this morning was so hot and humid, Malinda and I were simply dripping. The girls were not bothered by the steaming temperature. They had more energy than their mother and grandmother. They were so happy to find the ubiquitous outdoor exercise equipment. . .

. . . though Maya had her own unique interpretation of "exercise!"

By late morning we had seen enough beautiful plants, trees and flowers and it was time to go home. Though we took a taxi to the gardens, not being quite sure where it was, we decided to take the bus home when we realized how close the gardens were to Zhongshan Park. As we walked to the bus stop near the park, we passed several stores with dancing costumes and shoes. We stopped at one, filled with costumes for children and adults, and found ballet shoes for Zoe and Maya and me for only 15 yuan a pair – less than $2 for ballet slippers!

During the short walk from the garden to the bus stop, we passed this cute statue of children climbing on an ox. . .

. . . and then this interesting statue of combat boots.

Xiamen certainly has an abundance of outdoor art.

We timed our trip just right, and arrived near home just in time for a cooling rain, but before the downpour. It was an enjoyable morning of scenic beauty.

A Trip to the Dentist

About 3 weeks ago I lost a filling in an upper molar. Did I dare go to a dentist in China? I contacted International SOS, a company that provides medical assistance to members in foreign countries, asking for a recommendation of a dentist in Xiamen. Their terse reply – we cannot recommend anyone in Xiamen and suggest you go to Hong Kong for non-emergency dental work. Hmm, doesn’t seem worth it just to get a filling done. I asked around the ex-pat community and got some recommendations, and then dilly-dallied around since the tooth wasn’t offering any pain. And then Tuesday I lost ANOTHER filling in a lower molar! I figured I better do something about the gaping holes (it’s amazing how your tongue just can’t leave the huge cavities alone and how large those suckers feel!). I made an appointment for this afternoon.

I wish I had some exotic tale of Eastern medicine, acupuncture needles, and pungent Chinese herbal medicine. Instead, I went to a very modern dental clinic and got perfectly modern dental care (in fact, Xiamen residents, I highly recommend Yao Dental Clinic)! The only surprise was how long it took – it’s been a long time since I had a filling, much less two fillings, but it took the dentist almost TWO HOURS of working pretty continuously to do the fillings. And none of this give-a-shot-and-disappear-for-20-minutes stuff I see at home – he gave me the shots (4 of them, but those were the only needles in sight!) and waited only a few moments before my mouth became numb. Then we drilled and drilled and drilled to remove the remains of the old fillings. Well, there was one other surprise -- it only cost 580RMB (about $75).

The oddest part of the whole experience was having the dentist and the hygienist chatter continuously in Chinese while working on me. Now, not being able to understand what people are saying around me is an extremely familiar experience for me these days. But it feels a little different when someone is drilling holes in your head. And at times my imagination would run away with me and I’d start believing they were finding some dread problem with my teeth . . . when they were probably just talking about last night’s episode of “Desperate Housewives!” (It could well have been “Desperate Housewives” – a student in class today told me all about an episode she saw that seemed related to today’s lesson!)

Luckily for me the dentist spoke English, but he broke the usual dentist mold and didn’t try to carry on a conversation with me while his hands were in my mouth! He basically spoke two words to me while he was working: “Relax” (yeah, right!); and “Sensitive?” asked each time I so much as twitched!

One funny thing – while I waited for my x-rays to develop, I picked up a book in the waiting room called, “English for Nurses.” It was obviously used to help the staff talk to English-speaking patients, since the word doctor was marked out and the word dentist substituted throughout. I was randomly flipping through it when I found this exchange:

Patient: I think I may be pregnant. Will you examine me, please?

Nurse: My pleasure. Please take off your shoes.

What?! In China they can tell if you’re pregnant by looking at your feet?! I turned the page and the nurse’s dialogue continued:

Nurse: First I must weigh you and measure you.

So much for the mysteries of Eastern medicine!

Playing Hooky

We kept the girls home from school on Tuesday so we could do something touristy and fun and not have to deal with weekend crowds. We decided to go back to Gulangyu since we barely scratched the surface in our first visit. We bought tickets for the tourist “bus” – remember that there are no motor vehicles allowed on Gulangyu, so the bus is a large golf cart – and rode around the island. We saw parts of the island we missed last time – the old U.S. consulate that has been restored and is now a hotel, statues galore – before coming to the beach. Three minutes for a photo-op, and we were on to our next destination.

The next stop was ostensibly a museum to Fujian culture, though it was essentially a big gift shop with the usual slightly-coercive tactics and high prices you find in such places. But I did learn some tidbits about Fujian culture I didn’t know. Familiar to all China-adoptive parents are the granite etchings that are sold in Guangzhou – you give them a photo of your new child and they do the etching with pin-prick tappings on stone with a needle-sized awl. Well, apparently, that started in Fujian Province. The museum guide told us that it was a technique handed down to females, and only to females. No men were taught this technique. Who knew?!

The guide also explained her costume as original to Fujian Province. Unmarried girls cannot show their ears or neck to a boy, so a scarf must be worn at all times. If a boy sees a girl’s ears or neck, he will be required to marry her. She said that her belt also marked her status as unmarried, since it was made from cloth. Married women wear belts of silver, and the heavier the belt, the wealthier the husband.

And that’s about all there was to the museum exhibit – we were then led to a small room to learn all about Fujian Province tea (in the hopes that we would buy some!). We should have guessed, I suppose, after seeing this teapot fountain in the courtyard!

It’s quite true that tea is important in Fujian. And Xiamen has been exporting tea to the West for centuries. In fact, the Fujian dialect word for tea was exported as well – in the French word the (you'll have to just imagine the accent over the e) and the English word tea. Other places imported tea from Guangdong Province and ended up with the Cantonese word for tea, chai. And the tea that was the subject of the infamous Boston Tea Party was from Xiamen!

We learned about different kinds of tea, and how to make each one. (For example, some are to be washed and strained before steeping, others are not. Some can be made with cold water, others cannot.). And we were instructed on how to hold the tiny handle-less teacups – the rim between thumb and forefinger, the bottom resting on the middle finger, and the last two fingers held out “because it is more beautiful” that way. (I must not be doing it right, because it certainly doesn't look "more beautiful" in my hand!)

We were also told it was alright to slurp the tea, especially when it is very hot because it cools it down in your mouth. And making smacking sounds with your mouth after slurping the tea is good because it helps you taste it in the back of your throat.

And then there was the litany of health benefits, with hand-out included. The silver tea is peony tea, and it is “antipyretic, detoxication to faucitis, tonsillitis, and upper respiratory infection.” It can also cure constipation when taken with a little honeysuckle. The little knots of tea on the left are lotus tea. If you steep it with “corn beard” it will lower blood pressure, “repress diabetes” and “debase the cholesterol.” When taken with honey it will protect the brain and “help one get over a shock.” The third tea “has the function of anti-cancer, refreshing oneself, fat reduction and blood pressure lowering.” If mixed with the lotus tea, “it can reduce weight wonderfully. Therefore it is popular with the middle-aged and elderly men at home and abroad.” (What about middle-aged and elderly women?!)

I don’t actually like tea, but I gamely tasted each one. The girls LOVED it, though, and I was able to fill up their cups with my tea so it looked more like I was a generous Mama than an uncultured tea-hater!

And because it’s China, and it’s the sort of thing one must do in China, I actually bought the lotus tea and the weight-reducing tea (though I’m not sure I’ll ever drink it, despite it’s magical fat-melting properties!)

We then explored the Shuzhuang Gardens, which were lovely.

(Have you ever seen a tree more in need of a shave?!) The girls especially loved climbing up and down stairs in the “12 Rockery Caves.”

See the beautiful tree with trumpet flowers behind the girls? We saw it from the ground, and it became our destination as we wandered through the maze-like caves. Finally, we reached it , and it was certainly worth the climb. Here’s a closeup:

Isn’t it gorgeous? I’ve never seen anything quite like it.

As we finished up in the gardens, it started to rain so we hurried to the Piano Museum – yes, the Piano Museum. Gulangyu has the largest piano museum in Asia, because when Christian missionaries came to Xiamen they brought bibles and PIANOS! The museum has player pianos and beautifully carved German pianos, and a number of Steinways, and a pair with gorgeous wood inlay pictures of birds. Mimi and I liked the museum, but the girls weren’t that excited by it.

Our next stop, though, was more to the girls’ liking – Gulangyu’s Underwater World, which is a large aquarium.

We were all amazed by the variety of water life on display. Some of the creatures seemed so improbable we thought they were fake – until we saw them breathing! The blue fish above was HUGE, probably about 3 feet long. The aquarium had a long “Acrylic Tunnel” that allowed you to walk among the fish and sharks, which the girls thought was just a little scary and pretty cool.

The aquarium also included a dolphin and sea lion show, to the girls’ great amusement.

I think the girls will long remember the joys of playing hooky – at least occasionally!

Art Contest

Remember Maya's art project? The teacher gave us a piece of paper before the May holiday and said "make a picture?" Well, I didn't realize it was for a school-wide art contest (especially since Zoe's teacher didn't say anything about it and didn't give Zoe a piece of paper . . . ). But when we got to school today the art was all displayed, and several parents rushed up to tell me that Maya had won second place! She must take after her Mimi!

I was really proud of Zoe, too -- there was great potential for sulking since she didn't even have a piece on display. But instead she gave Maya a big hug to congratulate her, and calmly assessed all the other pictures to find her favorites. Whew!

Anyway, I thought you might want to see some of the drawings. Pretty impressive for 3-5 year-olds.

On the Catwalk

I did my little English lesson for Maya’s class today, and afterwards the class went out to the playground for afternoon exercises. The teacher divided the class in two, girls on one side and boys on the other (notice that there are more girls in Maya’s class than boys). She’d brought the small boom box they use to play cassettes, and I expected to see folk dancing, or perhaps some kind of I’m-a-little-teapot-type children’s dance. Instead, we got models on the catwalk!

The teacher sent the kids out in pairs to strut their stuff on the catwalk to a driving disco beat:

And the teacher encouraged them to strike a pose – and with Mimi behind the camera, the kids really hammed it up!

I have no idea what this was about, but I thought I’d die laughing. Most of the girls seemed to have seen models on the runway before, and would do their turns and poses like seasoned pros. The little girl in the red skirt put such a swing in her hips on her way back UP the catwalk that I thought she’d sprain something!

The little boys looked more like they were auditioning for the opening montage in a James Bond movie than modeling clothes.

Others just had to add the typical Chinese two-finger salute (though this looks more like John Travolta in "Saturday Night Fever" to me).

Maya graced us with a princessly curtsy.

It was just so bizarre! What a strange exercise for 3-to-5-year-olds. I can’t say I appreciate such grown-up behavior in little kids. Though the music was different, all I could hear in my head was that one-hit wonder “I’m Too Sexy.” Remember it?

I’m too sexy for my shirt,

so sexy it hurts . . .

I'm a model, you know what I mean,

And I do my little turn on the catwalk.

Yeah, on the catwalk, on the catwalk, yeah.

I shake my little tush on the catwalk.

I don't think I'll ever understand China. Here I talk about how the Chinese are more modest than Americans in dress and deportment, and then I see something like this! But it really was a hoot to watch!

A trip to the mall

The day dawned rainy and gray, so we decided to do what we do in America on a rainy day – we went to the mall! Making the decision is about the only thing that resembled a trip to the mall at home, though. First of all, we took the bus instead of driving the car.

Like in America, we shopped ‘til we dropped – but unlike America, the prices were fabulously low! I bought each girl a skirt and top in this store, each piece $3. (The girls are singing along to the radio blaring in the shop. The words of the song are Chinese, but it is unmistakably “It’s So Easy to Fall In Love (it’s so easy, it’s so easy, yeah, yeah!)”).

We even found kiddie entertainment at the mall here, though perhaps you wouldn’t expect a carriage drawn by a formerly-live and stuffed horse in America (this seems to be our weekend for taxidermy)!

And like in America, we ate at the mall food court – and that’s as far as the similarity went. But I love eating at the food court here, because everything imaginable is on display, and you simply have to point to get what you want!

You’d never find Wal-Mart as an anchor store in a mall in America, but you do in China. So we zipped in to get just a few items after our mall adventure. It was so crowded and noisy that we hurried to get out. The noise was mostly from music blaring – it was like a three-ring circus and a rodeo mixed into one! We pretty much ran screaming from the store. Thankfully, the bus ride home was QUIET and not crowded at all. And thankfully the rain had stopped, so we didn’t have to juggle our groceries (including a watermelon – what were we thinking?!) and umbrellas.

The mall in China is a jumble of new sights and sounds, exotic smells and tastes. And just like in America, it makes a great place to while away a rainy day!

More Photos From Saturday

Which one is it?

Have you figured out yet which photo in the LWB art auction is mine?

I'll give you a hint -- it is NOT the one from Xiamen! Someone else gets credit for that lovely photo of Gulangyu.

So which one is it? Post your guess in the comments!

The Bears Went Over the Mountain

Yesterday afternoon, as we walked from the law school to the kindergarten, the sky went as black as night and rain poured down in sheets. Umbrellas were pretty useless under that onslaught. Still, we managed to get the girls and make it home without drowning! The forecast for today was rain, rain, rain, so we didn’t want to go too far afield. We decided to walk down Siming Nanlu, toward a park we often see from the bus, just to see what we could see. I figured if it started to rain, we’d be able to easily catch a bus home. We managed to avoid the rain, and made some fun discoveries along the way.

Our trek started at the book fountain, which seems a fitting sight for a road that leads into a university.

As we walked, we passed lots of apartment buildings and small stores, many with details worthy of photographing (not that it takes that much for me to consider something photo-worthy!). Soon we spied a wonderfully exotic building in the near distance.

I had no idea what it was, but we decided to head in that direction. Even as we approached, it wasn’t clear what the building was for. We entered into a garden and approached the building. I thought it might be a hotel, or a government office, but it turns out it was the Overseas Chinese Museum.

I had read about the museum, and knew it was not far from Xiada, but I hadn’t really focused on where it was. As fascinating as the experiences of emigrants from China can be, I had pretty low expectations for a museum dedicated to their exploits. [Museums in China can really be deadly dull, too.] Boy, was I wrong! The museum turned out to be very interesting!

The first floor was dedicated to the experience of leaving China by boat, since that is how most emigrated. There were replicas of wooden boats, and drawings of Chinese crammed into the holds of boats, and statues reenacting the scenes. The exhibit reminded me very much of images of African slaves being shipped to the Americas.

The second floor was dedicated to the daily life of Overseas Chinese in Chinatowns throughout the world. There was information about the contributions of Chinese to the world economy, including scenes of rubber plantations, mines, and railroad construction. There was even a section about more modern contributions, with lots of pictures of Chinese businessmen and computer moguls. This floor also had the girls’ favorite exhibit – animals of Asia. And these were actual animals, preserved and stuffed. It seemed pretty cheesy to me, but the girls loved it.

The third floor had “Relics from the Collection of Mr. Tan Kan Kee.” He’s the Overseas Chinese who founded Xiamen University, and is probably the most famous of the Overseas Chinese who brought the wealth he earned abroad back to Xiamen. He had a fascinating collection of metal vessels, pottery, statues, and calligraphy scrolls. The displays were very well done, and very modern -- the lights in the cases with the scrolls were set with motion detectors so that each scroll was lighted only when someone stepped to the case to see it. I'm glad they are working hard to preserve these beautiful pieces of art, so of which were hundreds of years old.

I’d say the museum was extremely effective, giving great insight into the life of the Overseas Chinese throughout the world, and their attempts to stay connected to Chinese culture and to China. I loved this poem etched in glass on the second floor:

The Green Leaf’s Attachment to the Root

Don’t ask me where to go,
my heart is attached to you.
Don’t ask me where to go,
my passions go with you.
I am one of your green leaves,
my root is deep in your soil.
Waving farewell in spring breeze,
I leave here and go far away.
Whichever cloud I dwell upon,
my gaze is always on you.
If I sing in the wind,
the song is also for you.
So don’t ask me where to go,
my road is full of memory.
Please bless me and I’ll bless you.
This is the green leaf’s attachment to the root.

– Wang Jian

I think the poem speaks well to the batch of Overseas Chinese near and dear to our hearts – our adopted sons and daughters.

After leaving the museum, we walked on toward our destination, momentarily distracted by this venerable building, crumbling into ruin. I liked the contrast of the old and the new – look at the modern new apartment building growing behind this near-ruin.

A few more blocks, and we reached our destination – Hongshan Park.

The park is completely vertical, step upon step up a mountain, with temples and bridges and pagodas and overlooks, and a teahouse at the top. But, first, we had a false start. Just behind the inscribed rock, we spied a tunnel. We decided to check it out, and it went on and on and on through the mountain! I thought we’d never get to the end. And at the end we were simply in a new neighborhood, with the usual weekend market. [Fascinating if you haven’t seen dozens like it!] But it was worth it – for the first time we saw lychees at the fruit sellers. Mimi has fond memories of eating fresh lychees when she was a child living in Africa, so she’s been on the look-out for them here. (We ended up having them for dessert after dinner, and Mimi says they are as good as she remembers!).

We went back through the tunnel, and then up the first of many stairs. We climbed and climbed, and came to a bridge over a tiny pond.

Across the bridge we found a small Buddhist temple. Buddha is happy today, isn't he?!

One of the best parts of the climb was the panoramic views of Xiamen from on high. We could even see over the strait to Gulangyu.

And in the opposite direction we could see the tall Xiada administration building, showing we hadn’t really walked that far from home!

And in between, lots and lots of rooftop views.

Mimi’s favorite part of the climb (it certainly wasn’t the stairs!) were the multitude of flowers along the way. The park was lush, green, and tropical.

We finally reached the highest point on the mountain after climbing for about an hour. Of course, we stopped quite a bit on the way up to enjoy the views and to REST – and eat snacks!

The girls loved this sleeping child statue at the entrance to the teahouse at the top of the mountain. Can you see that Maya is petting the mouse sleeping on the child’s shoulder? There’s another mouse at his feet. Maya decided that the child was sleeping on an ice cream cone – kind of explains the mice, doesn’t it?!

If it took us over an hour to get up the mountain, how long do you think it took to get down the mountain? How about less than 15 minutes?! Of course, gravity is your friend going down, and your enemy going up!

Once we hit flat ground, we walked two blocks to the bus stop, and took a bus home. There’s only so much walking we’re willing to do! We ate a huge lunch at Lin Duck House to refuel, and then walked home just as the rain started to spit on us.

Perfect timing! No downpour to mar our perfect walking expedition!

LWB Art Auction

Don't forget the Love Without Boundaries Art Auction, which starts today (U.S. time), Friday, May 18. You can reach the auction by clicking the hot link above for the LWB homepage, or you can go directly to the LWB eBay store where the auction is hosted.

Remember, the auction proceeds with provide needed heart surgeries for Chinese orphans. So bid early and bid often!

Paperweights

I've always considered paperweights to be completely useless objects. I have 3 or 4 on my desk at Texas Wesleyan -- all given as awards or commemorations, and all useless dust-catchers. What's the point of such an object in our central-heat-and-air world? Well, being in China has given me a new appreciation for the simple paperweight! I work in my law school office with my door and window open to create a cooling cross-breeze (my office door opens to an outdoor courtyard). I'm forever scrambling to find something to weigh down my papers before the wind sends them skittering across my office.

So for adoptive parents trying to come up with ideas for gifts to bring to China for Civil Affairs officials and notaries, I'd highly recommend paperweights. I bet they have to deal with even more papers than I do, and I'm quite sure they are doing it with open windows most of the time. Paperweights are small and easily transportable, and they don't have to weigh much to do their job. And I'm sure you can find them with local flavor -- if nothing else, buy flat river rocks and paint the state flower on them! I wish I'd thought of it before my adoption trips . . .

Finding the art shop again

This morning Malinda left at 7:00 to go to her 8:00 class. Later I walked the girls to kindergarten. It was a beautiful morning, not too hot and only slightly humid. On the way to school we stopped to watch quite a few ladies dressed in white slacks and red shirts dance while someone was filming them. [Malinda writes: As I was walking to school, I saw small groups of women wearing identical outfits walking toward me. I wondered what they were up to!] They were probably in their 50’s and 60’s and were not all in synch with each others but they were enjoying themselves. We certainly enjoyed watching them.

[Malinda writes: Notice the coal-black hair. My first couple of times in China I was amazed at how little gray hair I saw on older women. I thought it must have something to do with genetics or superior nutrition. Having been here awhile, I now know it is about hair dye! Almost all Chinese women dye their hair as they start to go gray -- and I've seen tons of gray roots to prove it!]

After I dropped off the girls I decided to try to find the art shop where I bought some supplies earlier this week. I have a fairly good sense of direction so off I started my trek. It took me almost an hour to get there. I did not rush, just walked and enjoyed the beautiful scenery. I loved to hear the birds singing. I stopped several times to take pictures, mostly of flowers. Here are a couple:

I found the shop and by gestures managed to convey to the man that I wanted to buy a portfolio and more art pencils. I am set now. I have enough art supplies to last me a while. I haven’t taken time to draw here, I’m too busy taking pictures.

After I left the art shop I found the main gate to Xiada and passed by a museum showing the history of the school, all in Chinese, of course. I did take a photo of a photo that showed an aerial view of the university. (Even though I turned off my flash there is still a light spot but that’s the best I have.) We pass by this lake everyday. The low building on the right is an old dorm that is still in use today. We walk almost to the ocean to take the girls to school.

On the way back I decided to sit by the lake awhile to rest and take more pictures. And as I sat there classical guitar music came on a loud speaker. I absolutely love classical guitar. Many years ago I took lessons (for 5 years) before I decided that I had ten left thumbs! I had a very difficult job at the time and did not have the energy to devote to practice everyday. A few people have natural musical talent. The rest of us need to practice a lot. Anyway, it was a wonderful end of my two-hour trek.

This afternoon I went to the park to wait for the girls to walk home. Zoe was surprised to see me and ran over to where I was sitting, shouting, “Mimi!” As you can see, Maya is always trailing behind. Mama is bringing up the rear!

The girls wanted to use the umbrella to shield the sun. I think they weren’t all that interested in shade, they just wanted to play with the umbrella. Here they are walking toward home. Notice other umbrellas in use in the background. I certainly like the idea of umbrellas to provide shade – in French there are actually two words for what we call umbrella. “Ombrelle” translates literally to mean “sun shade.” A “parapluie" is for use in the rain (“pluie" means rain).

Today was another great day in Xiamen. I feel lazy just walking around and enjoying the area. But I love it.

A Slow Day

Yesterday was a slow day. I needed a “down” day. After Malinda and the girls left, I put a load in the washing machine and I went back to bed and read. When the wash was done I hung the clothes on the balcony. I was surprised at how enjoyable it was to hang clothes on a line. I had not done this since my children were young. It brought back a lot of good memories. (Parents of young children must treasure every moment because your children will be grown before you know it!) Someone asked me once when was I the happiest in my life, and I honestly said “it was when I was knee deep in babies.”

I then walked to Nanputuo, the nearby Buddhist temple and monastery. I just wandered about the gardens, which were very peaceful and uncrowded. I also walked in several small stores selling Buddhist items from bibles to burning sticks. I bought a CD of Buddhist chant and a small present for a friend. (I was really looking for a book about mandalas or at the very least some mandala pictures but I did not see any.)

I then walked across the street and went in several small shops. Several of these shops had American music blaring – I recognized a song by Celine Dion. Most of the adult clothes sizes are teeny-tiny and baby-doll styles that many college students like to wear. (Walking on Xiada campus I have seen many girls wearing lacy camisoles over a shirt but no bare midriff like you see in American college campuses.)

I then went home for lunch and listened to my CD of Buddhist chants . . . which promptly put me to sleep. I used to teach patients how to relax – I should have let them listen to a Buddhist chant and saved myself a lot of work!

It was time to go meet Malinda in Zoe’s class for the first English class (she has been teaching in Maya’s class for a while, but she just made arrangements with Zoe’s teacher this week). It was incredibly muggy outside, proving the adage, “It’s not the heat, it’s the humidity!” I made use of the umbrella Malinda gave me for Mother’s Day to create my own oasis of shade, and almost felt like a native. It seems that most women use an umbrella so that their skin will stay light.

Zoe’s class is very big – 38 students! I don’t know how the teachers manage them every day. They were pretty rowdy, and Malinda had to teach them “Quiet,” and “Shhhhhhh,” almost at the start! The kids seemed to enjoy the lesson, especially when Malinda picked out kids to use as models to teach body parts – she would point to the child’s head, shoulders, knees, etc., and the class would shout out the English word. And then they would dissolve into giggles when she wiggled the child’s ears instead of just pointing at them. They all wanted to volunteer after that.

It was much too warm to stay in the park as we do every day when we walk home from school, so we went straight home. We are thankful for AC! We checked online to see how hot it was outside. It was 93 degrees and very humid. Perhaps the thunder storm we had in the evening will tame the temperature a bit.

Love Without Boundaries Art Auction

Love Without Boundaries is a nonprofit organization that helps Chinese orphans, from foster care to school fees to nutrition programs to medical care. Four years ago, LWB began their "Born in My Heart" art auction to raise funds for essential heart operations. The auction is online at eBay, and runs from May 18-23. Items will be added throughout the day on Friday, May 18th and the auction will end Wednesday, May 23rd when the final item closes.

From an email about the auction from the LWB Art Auction Committee: “This year we have approximately 250 amazing items, all donated by our fabulous supporters! Just a few of the items you won't want to miss are: an autographed guitar from Steven Curtis Chapman, THREE giclee prints of "Bengbu Girl"…an incredible oil painting created especially for LWB by Zhao Kailin, a life-size Terra Cotta Warrior statue from Xian, several personalized custom lifebooks, beautiful watercolors, acrylics and oil paintings, collection-edition dolls, custom adoption videos, a stunning array of quilts including several "100 Good Wishes" quilts, photography, gift baskets, jewelry, paintings by Chinese orphans, clothing, heritage items, and so much more!”

Last month, one of the LWB volunteers contacted me after seeing some of the photos on this blog. She asked if I would consider donating a photograph for the art auction. Of course I said yes! So go to the auction and see if you can spot my donation. And bid early and bid often!

Starting Friday, you will be able to access the auction from the Love Without Boundaries homepage. In the meantime, check out the website to see all the remarkable things LWB does for Chinese orphans.

American Intellectual History Seminar

Last month, I met a professor who teaches in the history department – his specialty is American history, and he’s written a book, in Chinese, about the American Revolution. He asked me to come speak to his class today – a class in American Intellectual History. The professor asked me simply to engage in a “free and open discussion” about all things American, so I didn’t have any prepared remarks. I just answered questions from the students for two hours!

I also had an interesting conversation with the professor as we walked to his class. He met me outside my apartment building to show me the way – he had said he would send someone to escort me, but I hadn’t expected it to be him! He was very interested in the girls, how they were reacting to China and kindergarten, and in the midst of the discussion he said he had two boys, aged 5 and 7. He admitted that people sometimes made very disparaging comments about the fact that he was adding to the overpopulation problem in China and violating the rules, etc. We also commiserated over being “older” parents – he shared that he had not married until he was 35 and that it was 8 years after the marriage before they had children.

Back to the students – most of them are writing papers for the class, and asked me questions relating to their topics. They were certainly interested in a variety of topics: gun control, race relations, AIDS, the religious right, and gay rights, to name a few. And the questions seemed very well thought out.

Some of the more interesting questions: Would the fact that the Virginia Tech shooter was Korean have an effect on race relations in America? Why didn’t the international community, including the United States, bring pressure on Japan to make apologies and reparations for World War II atrocities, like we brought pressure on Germany to do so? What role did Thomas Jefferson play in the drafting or ratification of the Bill of Rights? Would Hilary Clinton be the next U.S. president, and could Bill Clinton be vice-president (!)? Did Alexander Hamilton support a national bank because he really believed it would help commerce or because he was rich and desirous of helping his rich friends? Had I seen the movie “The Day After,” and did it awaken Americans to the potential for environmental disaster?

In the midst of all of this talking, I was explaining my last article to them – about the natural-born citizen clause of the U.S. Constitution – and the concept of “perpetual foreigner” in America (the fact that we tend to see people as belonging to their country of origin or perceived country of origin, rather than to America, even if they are American citizens). I used my mother as an example – the fact that she is perceived as French, rather than American, because of her French accent, despite the fact that she has been an American citizen over twice as long as she was a French citizen. And I said that my children are marked as foreign because of their appearance. But, I said, their appearance also marks them as foreign in China. People seem to be able to tell that they are not Chinese, but are American, even if I’m not around. So I asked HOW they can tell when someone is overseas Chinese. The students immediately said it was the clothes and the hair. And the professor, who has seen me walking through campus with the girls, said, “And your girls are too skinny to be Chinese children!” I said, “I know, but I promise I do feed them – despite what it looks like,” gesturing to my body, “I don’t eat ALL the food in the house myself!” The class roared with laughter, and the professor said, “You’ve just seen a great example of American humor!”

At the end, the professor asked me what advice I could give the students who might want to study in America, advice about how they could succeed in their studies there. I took that as an opportunity to talk about what I saw as the difference between education in China and in America. I said that my impression of Chinese education was that it emphasized abstract knowledge. All the students nodded. I said that when I walked through the park, I always saw students standing alone reading texts aloud or reciting things to be memorized. But, I said, I don’t see students in small groups discussing or debating what they were learning about in class. Did that happen, I asked? And they admitted it did not, that their education was heavy on rote memorization. I said that I thought American education emphasized application, how to make knowledge useful in one’s life, how to solve problems, how to find one’s own truth. I suggested that the most important quality in a student was skepticism, and that Chinese students tended to accept the teacher as the absolute authority rather than questioning what the teacher says. To my surprise, the professor added, “And we don’t question authority in the political arena enough, either!”

I really enjoyed talking to the students, and afterwards several asked for my email address and whether they could sit in on my law classes. Of course, I said they would be most welcome to attend. We’ll see if they actually follow through.

Xiada Art School

This morning, I took Zoe and Maya to school because Malinda had an early appointment (she’ll blog about that later). After I dropped the girls at kindergarten, I walked in search of Xiada’s art school, which Malinda told me was just past the law school. I passed the law school and just about thought I had missed the art school when there it was. How did I know this was the art school? I just made a wild guess, that’s all. It certainly wasn’t because I could read the entrance sign!

As I was walking to the art school I had seen posters advertising a one woman art show for the next 3 days.

I climbed the @%&# stairs and there was the gallery. There were a few people standing and I heard one lady say “welcome,” so I entered and looked at several nice oil paintings. It turned out that the lady was the artist! She is 73 years old, and came to Xiamen from Taiwan to be a student at the art college. She seemed delighted to have me enter the room and admire her work. She, and all the others there, were very excited to have me sign the guest book – I gave my address as Fort Worth, Texas, USA. I’m sure I was the visitor who traveled the furthest to see her exhibit! She asked a young student to take our picture. Even though I am only 5’2’’, I feel tall here!

We chatted a while and I asked if I could see some classes. One teacher gave me his business card, which read: “PhD of Art, Master of Oil Painting.” He gave his key to one student and asked her to show me the oil painting studio. I had to climb a few more stories of stairs, but who’s counting at this point? (Actually, I am – it was three more stories!) Here is what the studio looked like. From what I understood from the young student, these are 4th and 5th year art students. Her English was not great but a heck of a lot better than my Chinese. Here she is with some of her paintings.

The next photo is of the classroom. The young student said there are 8 students in this class.

It seems that the students paint from a photograph, rather than from a live model. Another student told me that the paintings are of her mother, so obviously she must have provided the photograph for this painting exercise. It’s interesting to see the different treatments of the same subject.

We then went back to the gallery and I asked where I could buy artist quality art supplies. Several people tried to give me directions, but in the end the “PhD of Art, Master of Oil Painting” professor was my guide. It was just across the street from the university, but on the other side from the area that I know. His English was basic but as we walked he told me his wife also teaches at the art school but that she teaches music, that she has a beautiful voice and sings operas. His daughter is also a first year student at Xiada, studying music at the art school.

We found the art shop after he made several phone calls to get more directions. I would never have found it on my own, since he needed help to find it! It was a hole in the wall, crammed with everything an artist might need.

I bought several things for much, much less than I do in Fort Worth. I spent about $10 American for about $80’s worth of supplies. I am ready for my next art class when I get back.

As we were walking I told him that that I am not really an artist. My area is psychology. It took some doing to get him to understand what psychology was, but with mime and sign language, I conveyed the message. He finally got it, and said that he and his wife have friends who studied psychology in the United States and they, of course, speak good English. These friends are coming over to their house on Friday, so he invited me and Malinda to their house. I gave him Malinda’s cell phone number and the English-speaking friend will call her to discuss when and where. I am amazed at the friendliness of the Chinese people. I haven’t even been here one week and we get invited to someone’s house. I’ve lived in Fort Worth 2 years and haven’t had an invitation to anyone’s house yet!

I had a great morning, but was glad to get back to our cool apartment. It is not so hot but it is very humid here. I like to walk and, for my age, think I am in good shape, but my calves are getting sore. But climbing all these stairs means that I’ll have the best-looking 68-year-old gluteus maximus in Fort Worth when I get back home!

I Would Walk 500 Miles, and I Would Walk 500 More

(How 'bout that? It's been a while since I made a musical reference, and now I've switched decades to -- what? -- the '80s?)

Several commenters have asked about our walking -- that's our primary mode of transportation these days, though sometimes we're walking to get a bus or taxi. And no, I was not much of a walker before getting here. I'm not very good about distances, so I'm relying on my mom's estimates here, but based on how long the walks take us, it seems about right.

From our apartment to the main bus station is only 3-4 blocks, so that hardly counts as a walk at all! And most of the buses we take stop within 3-4 blocks of our destination, so there isn't much of a walk at that end, either. The nearest store where we go for snacks and the like is 3-4 blocks in a direction opposite the main bus station. And the famous Lin Duck House restaurant is only about 6 blocks away, and about the same for the "usual restaurant" in the Yifu Building on campus.

Our longest hikes are for school -- the girls' kindergarten is about 1.5 miles from our apartment, and the law school is another half mile beyond that. So, round trip, the girls are walking about 3 miles a day and I'm walking about 4 miles a day. Some days I take the girls to school and come home to work, and then go pick them up at the end of the day and walk them home, and those are 6-mile days. And we try the best we can to combine trips -- for example, the fruit and vegetable market near Beach Gate is about .25 miles from the girls' school, so we go to the market on the way to or from school.

It was REALLY hard at first for me, especially the uphill climb to the law school. And then there were the steps -- two flights up to our apartment, four flights up to Zoe's classroom, 4.5 flights up to my office in the law school (my office is on the 5th floor, which is only 4 flights, but you have to climb up one flight and down one flight in another building to get to the second floor to go up another three flights!) . Some days I felt that I could do the 2-mile walk, or I could do the 5th-story climb, but I couldn't do both! There were times I'd make it to the law school and then have to stop on each floor to "gaze out the window to look at the sea" while I caught my breath, hoping I wasn't too obviously out of breath.

It took about 6 weeks for the walk to the law school and then up to my office to become easy. It was definitely better each week, but 6 loooong weeks passed before it seemed easy! So I'm definitely in much better shape than I was when we got here.

But I really haven't lost as much weight as I expected I would. I lost weight on each adoption trip, and between healthier Chinese food and tons more activity, I expected the pounds to just melt off. Someone left a scale in the apartment -- a metric one -- and I've only lost 3-4 kilos, about 6 to 8 pounds. Oh, well, I know I'm building muscles. I actually have some definition in my calves and I'm slimmer in the thighs and hips, I think.

The most amazing thing is that the girls do these walks with nary a complaint. It's as if walking 35 minutes to school each day is perfectly normal! Of course, we go pretty slowly when they are with me -- at least, I go slowly, as they walk 15 steps for each one of mine because they run ahead and then come back, or walk three times around a flower bed instead of just walking by it once. They especially love walking through the park, where they can climb up on rocks and sing-song, "I'm the king of the castle, and you're the dirty rascal!" And we play detective as we try to figure out which tree a particular flower or fruit or leaf on the ground came from.

I still have fantasies sometimes of owning one of those cute red scooters, or an electric-assist motorized bike -- especially when walking uphill to the law school carrying a backpack full of handouts for my students. But I don't fantasize about having a car here; I can't even imagine navigating the crazy traffic in China. And I don't mind the walk so much any more, though with the temperatures warming up I expect I'll be arriving at the law school dripping with sweat for my classes. And with no air conditioning in the classrooms, I expect I'll stay dripping with sweat! Still, the walking isn't as bad as I expected it would be. And it gets easier and easier each day.

Shopping Day

Even going to the grocery store is an adventure in China! This morning Malinda and I took bus # 21 to Zhongshan Lu, the shopping street. Our destination was the large supermarket, Trust-Mart, since Malinda said she was out of just about everything. But before shopping there, we walked along Zhongshan Lu and looked in the multitude of little shops. We went to the little shop where Malinda had purchased the ethnic dresses for the girls, and I bought the exact one (aqua) that the girls wore in a previous post to send to Judy in KS for the auction that benefits Chinese orphanages. Judy, you will have to send me your snail mail address so that I can mail it to you when I return home.

It’s a good thing there are people in the picture above, so you can tell it is a sculpture – Malinda thinks it looks like butter molds for the Jolly Green Giant, though she can offer no explanation for why the butter molds have gold turtles on them! As I finished taking the picture, I just had to document the everyday duty of a mother shopping with her toddler. I wish I had seen this a minute earlier, as she was holding the child a foot away , right where you see the wet spot. It doesn’t take much imagination to figure out what was going on just before Mom had to wipe her bottom, does it?

We then spent the rest of the time shopping for groceries at Trust-Mart. It is quite disconcerting to me to be unable to read ANYTHING. We bought frozen dumplings with helpful cooking directions like, “Can boil,” or with drawings of dumplings floating in a pot to suggest, “Can boil!” We purchased snacks just looking at pictures and hoping that what is inside is what we think it is. Malinda is really good at getting what she wants. We had to remind ourselves that we had to take the bus home so not to buy many things like we do back in Texas! Still, hauling everything back on the bus was an adventure!

We had to rest before eating lunch and then rest after lunch, too. Later in the afternoon, I got a hair cut, which is as good as I get at home and a whole lot cheaper (about $2). The shampoo bowl was interesting – instead of leaning back in a chair with your head over the sink, this place has you lie down! It works pretty well for those of us with short necks.

It was also interesting to see the machine for giving permanent waves. I haven’t seen one of these since I was a girl in France!

On the way to the girls’ kindergarten, there is a very tall wall on the hill and one lonely plant grows in the crack in a wall. I think it is quite lovely, and obviously quite tenacious.

As usual, the girls were happy to see Mama and Mimi. They played in the courtyard while they had their snack – here they are inside the castle on the playground.

The temperature was perfect so we sat in the park while the girls played some more and then stopped to eat at what the girls call “the usual restaurant” – a large restaurant in the Yifu Building on Xiada campus – and then we walked leisurely home. Another great day!

Happy Mother's Day!

We had an adventurous Mother’s Day today, looking for the 10,000 Rock Botanic Garden and never finding it – but we found other interesting things along the way, so it was a good day.

The guidebook directions for finding the garden was to go over the mountain behind Xiada by passing the circular dining hall and bearing left past the mineral water bottling company and the Buddhist nunnery. How hard could that be, right?! Especially since I knew exactly where the circular dining hall was. Well, that was the last familiar sight we saw . . . until we found ourselves at the law school instead of at the botanic garden!

We walked past the dining hall, and up and up and up the winding road, until we came upon an unexpected lake!
Now, this is the point where I should have turned suspicious. When we were at Si Bo’s house, Han told us that there was a road from Nanputuo gate to the law school that passed a lake, but it never occurred to me that we were on THAT road rather than the road to the botanic garden. We even asked someone who spoke English, and he gave a sort of ambiguous answer that sounded like we were headed the right way, and then said something else that made me think that maybe he didn’t understand what we were asking. And the guidebook hadn’t mentioned passing a lake . . . .

But on we walked, with Maya insisting on frequent breaks. . .

until we came to a tunnel. Now, if I were writing directions to the botanic garden, I think I’d mention a tunnel – maybe I’d forget to mention a lake, but surely I’d mention a tunnel. And the guidebook most assuredly did not mention a tunnel. But on we soldier, through the tunnel. After all, tunnels go through mountains, and the botanic garden is on the other side of the mountain, right?!

Soon we saw a cluster of apartment buildings that looked sort of familiar, and I thought I saw glimpses of the ocean beyond them, and it occurred to me that we were near Si Bo’s house, and nowhere near the botanic garden! Sigh.

We headed to the law school, planning to look online for better directions to the botanic gardens, but when we passed Han’s office, the door unexpectedly opened – she was working today! She wished us a happy Mother’s Day, and I asked if that holiday was celebrated in China, and she assured me it was. So why was she working on Mother’s Day, I asked? She said Si Bo wasn’t at home, since he had ping pong lessons and calligraphy lessons today. And she wrote “10,000 Rock Botanic Garden” in Chinese for us to give to a taxi driver.

But by this time, it was 11 o’clock, the girls were whining that they were hungry – after all, they had walked over a mountain, even if it wasn’t the right mountain! So we decided to put off the botanic garden until another day and head for the beach instead. There are restaurants on the boardwalk that we could check out.

This is beginning to sound like an extended metaphor for motherhood – wandering about with no idea if you’re headed in the right direction, getting lost, getting found, finding help, and going off in another direction altogether that leads to fun and adventure. And indeed, we ended up having a fun and adventurous Mother’s Day lunch.

After walking a while on the boardwalk, we found a restaurant with beach-side dining and went in. The host spoke a little English, and we asked for a table near the beach. They didn’t have any available – after all, it’s Mother’s Day! They were very crowded, and had signs suggesting some kind of Mother’s Day special, but since “Mother’s Day” was the only English on the sign, I have no idea what special it was. But he said he would give us “a room.” That means a private banquet room. It was really nice to have our own private room with a sitting area for lounging until the food came.

I pulled out my trusty “Essential Guide to Mandarin” book, set to order lunch, when the waitress beckoned me to follow her out of the room. I followed, thinking perhaps she was taking me to someone who spoke English. No, she was taking me to the live fish and seafood tanks so I could PICK OUT our meal!
Not being able to tell an oyster from a scallop when it is not sautéed on my plate, I went back to our room and sent Mimi to do the ordering! She selected shrimp and clams. But soon she was back telling me I had to pick out the fish, but that there was a very helpful fellow who spoke English and said he knew me.

Who could that be? It turned out to be a man who saw me and the girls at the park on the day the firefighters were running their drills there. When Mimi went to pick out lunch, she had Zoe with her, and he immediately recognized Zoe and asked where her little sister was! And it turns out the man is a featured chef at the restaurant.

He helped me select a fish, and suggested some vegetable dishes, and as we were heading back to our room, he showed me a poster on the wall of himself making Indian flatbread. I said, well, we HAD to have some of his flatbread, then!Soon the food started coming, and it was all delicious. The Indian flatbread had banana slices in it, and the girls loved it.

The shrimp was coated in spices and deep-fried, and you are to eat it shell and all. It was wonderful, even the head and tail!

The clams were very fresh and very tasty, sautéed with garlic and spring onions and red peppers. The dish looked every bit as good as it tasted. And the fish was wonderful – what little the girls left me to eat! They’ve become quite the fish-eaters. And you can see how proficient they’ve become with chopsticks – all the good food we’re having is a great motivator to master chopsticks.

We walked home from the boardwalk via the Beach Gate, and stopped at the fruit market there. In addition to mangos, pipas, and pineapple, we bought a fresh coconut. The fruit seller punched a hole in it and provided two straws, and the girls drank every bit of the coconut milk before we could even walk home. (And then you should have seen us after dinner trying to break the @#%$ thing open to get to the meat! After attacking it with a hammer and scissors and a knife, we finally managed it!).

So, we had quite an adventure for Mother’s Day – it wasn’t the Mother’s Day adventure we planned, but it was just right anyway! And when we got home, Mimi and the girls gave me the perfect Mother’s Day gift – Mimi made sure Zoe and Maya played quietly together and allowed me to take a nice long nap!

One day, about 5 months ago, Zoe told me, “I have lots of mothers – I have a regular, a birth, a god, and a grand. And Maya also has a regular, a birth, a foster, and a grand.” Yes, indeed, my girls have lots of important mothers in their lives. I know that a lot of adoptive parents don’t like the “what about her real parents” question, since it seems to imply that adoptive parents aren’t real parents. Many will answer, “We ARE her real parents.” I agree, I’m Zoe’s and Maya’s REAL mom – or their REGULAR mom to use Zoe’s words! But their birth mothers are real mothers, too. They made an incredibly important contribution to these girls – they gave them life, and then made sure they had a life by putting them where they would be found quickly. I thank God every day for their birth parents, and pray that they have found peace in the decision they made.

And learning today that Mother’s Day is celebrated in China, I’ve been thinking a lot of Zoe’s and Maya’s birth mothers, wondering what they are thinking today. I have to admit, one of the reasons I chose to adopt from China was that there was no “danger” of birth parent contact. I found the whole idea completely threatening. But now, having my girls, knowing that they aren’t at all confused about who their “regular” mom is, and knowing how much it would mean to them to have more information about their birth families, I’d give anything to have the chance to meet their birth mothers. I would have so many questions for them. And I would want to tell them how incredible these children are. And I would want to thank them for giving me the opportunity to be a mother.

So, to all the mothers out there – the regular, the birth, the foster, the god, and the grand – Happy Mother’s Day!

More Photos From Gulangyu

I love this picture of Maya on the ferry, perhaps a little unsure of where we are going, but looking so pretty with her flowers and flowered dress -- and then reflected in the mirrored seat.

These are views from the ferry, as we approached Gulangyu.

This jumble of statues is from the art school, looking forgotten on a balcony. . . .

My favorite part of the island was looking at the old crumbling mansions, still occupied but sadly decaying, their gardens overgrown with ivy. Picking out the elaborate detailing really showed the former glory of these old beauties.

Saturday at Gulangyu

[We've decided that Mimi's posts will be in red type, so you can tell who it is! I'll keep the boring black type! (Apologies to the color-blind!) BTW, Yu= Island, so we either went to Gulang Island, or Gulangyu, but a lot of people say in English Gulangyu Island! -- MS]

Our day started bright and early. We all awoke with the birds and were out of the house by 7:30. We walked to the bus stop and rode to the ferry. I am glad I don’t have to drive in this city. The bravest goes first, and they must have good brakes!

The ferry ride was short, maybe 5 to 10 minutes. It was crowded even at this early hour. I think everything is crowded here. We meandered through narrow streets trying to find a large church and never found it. After many turns and help from a very nice lady we arrived at the Art Institute that I really wanted to see. We were lucky to find a couple of classes with students working on their art work. They were as excited to see us as we were to find them. They were working on “Paper Cuts”. It was lovely. Here is an example of what we saw there. Even the frames were made of paper.

I would like to go back on a weekday to be able to see other art classes in session.

We walked on a street where we could see the beach. The girls had to go walk on the sand.

We then walked some more just enjoying the scenery. There are many large houses that were built in the late 1920’s and early 1930’s. People still live in them, but they are multi-family apartments now. Most are in disrepair since maintenance of buildings is not a priority here.

As we were walking and taking loads of pictures we often heard piano music. Some sounded like accomplished pianists, others were obviously beginners. This island is also known as the “Piano Island”. When the missionaries arrived here they brought pianos to have in each church to accompany them when they taught hymns. There is also a “Piano Museum” but we wimped out and were too tired to find it. We definitely have to go back. We had lunch on the third floor of a building with a view of the harbor and Xiamen. At the end of our trip we walked through a couple of shopping street. Like most stores in such places it was a tourist trap. We did buy paper hats for the girls. They were happy with our purchase but too tired to show it.

These girls are truly amazing. They go along with the flow. They eat anything you put in front of them. At lunch today they ate an entire steamed fish that was almost a foot long. Of course they did not eat the head, nor the tail, but still it was a lot of fish. Even though I know they were tired at the end of the day, we had no crying, no melt down. Like I said, “Amazing little girls”.

Happy Birthday, Mimi!

I doubt there are many 68-year-old Americans celebrating their birthday in China today – there aren’t that many adventurous enough to travel by themselves to the other side of the world! (Mimi was born in the Chinese Zodiac Year of the Rabbit, and it’s clear China doesn’t have the same idea of rabbit – timidity – that Westerners do) But of course Mimi is a seasoned traveler, having lived in France, Madagascar, the Belgian Congo, and all over the U.S., and having traveled to countless other places. She came with me to China for both adoption trips for the girls, and I don’t know how I would have managed without her. So of course we wanted to make her birthday extra-special!

Zoe and Maya had each made Mimi a mandala – a special kind of circle drawing she taught them – but couldn’t wait until today to give them to her, so her birthday actually started yesterday with the girls sneaking the mandalas out of the cabinet in my room and giving them to Mimi while my back was turned! They then woke up at 5:45 this morning to start the day off bright and early (yipes, WAAAAY too bright and early). Happy pre-dawn birthday to you, Mimi!

Since we were up so early, we decided to take a special trip to Gulangyu, a nearby island – more about that in the next post! After touring, we treated Mimi to a scrumptious lunch of shrimp, steamed fish, broccoli, and fried rice. Mmm, mmm, finger-lickin’ good!

After we came home, Zoe and I sneaked out to cook up a birthday surprise for Mimi (of course, Zoe is not the best co-conspirator for any secret project – she just had to announce to Maya what we were doing, and do everything but put it on a neon sign for Mimi to read!). We went to the bakery to get little cakes, hit a near-by store for a small present (an umbrella), and stopped at a booth near Nanputuo to get flowers (actually, the flowers are really for making offerings at the Buddhist temple, but I don’t see any reasons why they can’t be used to celebrate a birthday! It was funny, though, as we walked home – people know the flowers are offered by Buddhists at the temple, so they would glance at the flowers and then look at me, and then do a double-take. It seems I don’t strike them as Buddhist for some reason!).

This all seems little enough to do to celebrate the birth of an extraordinary woman – wife, mother, grandmother, counselor, artist, role model, friend.

Happy birthday to you, Mimi, and here's wishing for many, many more!

Grandpa is STRONG!

As we walked home from school yesterday, Maya and I were having a silly conversation about lifting our apartment building and moving it (don't ask!). I said I couldn't lift up the building and move it, and Maya said, "Grandpa can -- he's STRONG!" She made her Popeye arms to illustrate the point. So Mimi asked the girls to show her how strong Grandpa is -- see, Grandpa is REALLY strong!

Divorce and the one child policy

We have been covering divorce and child custody in my Women in American Law class. The students have been very interested in the topic, since there has been much recent reporting about the growth in China’s divorce rate over the last several years (see, for example, here and here and even here).

I’ve been curious about how divorce and remarriage (or death of a spouse and remarriage) affects the one family, one child policy, so took the opportunity to ask my students. They were not in complete agreement about what the law is, but the consensus seemed to be as follows: If a person has a child and then divorces and remarries, he or she can have another child so long as the person they are marrying does not have any children. But if the new spouse also has a child, then there cannot be a child of that new marriage.

I was a little amused as the students hashed out what the law actually was, because they relied on the same sorts of things my students at home frequently rely on – anecdotes and television! One student said she thought a person could have another child even if the new spouse had a child already, because her brother had a child and had recently married a woman with a child, and the family’s understanding was that they could have another child (I did not ask her how it is she came to have a brother!). Another said it must be allowed, because there is a popular television show where a widow with one child marries a widower with one child, and then they have another child together (it seems the Brady Bunch, China style, just has 3 kids!). Well, then, if it’s on TV, it must be true, right?! But when it’s state-controlled TV, maybe it is . . . .

A Busy Day

Mimi’s first full day at Xiada was a busy one. Since I have an early class on Thursday mornings, we were out of the apartment before 7 to take the girls to school. Mimi was impressed with the tropical foliage, and took this glorious photo of a perfectly-formed hibiscus. And with Mimi here and toting her camera, you’re going to have to suffer through many more photos of me, like this one of me and the girls on the overlook to the ocean near the girls’ school.

On Thursdays, we get to school before it "officially" opens, but the porter lets us in anyway. There are other kids who get there as early as us, but not many. Today we were the first to arrive. In the courtyard of the school, Zoe had to show Mimi her tai chi moves from the morning exercises her class does. She's getting pretty good at it!

Mimi then walked to the law school with me, and can confirm that it IS up hill all the way, as I’ve claimed! She suffered through a class on individual liberties, including moot court oral arguments from my students. She found their English hard to understand – I’ve had a few months to become accustomed to it, and I had the advantage of knowing what they were talking about! I thought I'd lost her a few times, but she managed not to nod off, despite the dryness of the lecture and the intensity of her jetlag!

After class we headed to the market to buy fruits (fresh pineapple, already peeled, papaya, and some little green and red fruit I've been eyeing without knowing what it is (and it turned out to taste like green (not yet ripe) peaches)), vegetables (baby bok choy and spring onions), and eggs. Of course, I had to show Mimi the meat market, too—with live fish and chickens and duck – but it didn’t faze her at all. After all, she says, it’s just like the markets in Africa where she lived as a child. In front of the egg-seller's booth, you can see a game -- on the blue table -- we frequently see played by the old men at the market.

On the way home through the park, we came upon a group of artists on the small island in the lake (as you can tell, the park is an interesting place). Since Mimi is an artist herself, we had to check it out.

They were working in oils, and some were very good. I don’t think they were students, since they were much older than the students here, so it must have been some kind of art club that gets together to paint. For purposes of comparison with what you see on the easels, Mimi took a photo of the artists’ view:

The buildings are the original dormitories for Xiada – built in 1912 – and still in use. You can tell by all the clothes hanging out to dry that it is the men’s dorm, and as we’ve walked by it dozens of times, I can tell you that they leave their clothes hanging out permanently, not just to dry on wash days! It looks much less ethereal close up, doesn't it?

We rested this afternoon – after all, Mimi is still jet-lagged, though I don’t have that excuse! We then headed back to Xiada kindergarten so I could teach Maya’s class some English. We added colors to our repertoire today, and the kids were amazingly good at remembering the English names for the colors. They had a lot of fun finding the people in the class who were wearing that color. Later, on the playground, I was playing with some of the kids, and I’d point out the colors on the balls they were playing with, and they really got into that.

We also did our usual stuff – Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star and Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes:

And we did my made-up song of “Hello, Hello, How Are You?” And the kids loved the “I love you” part where they hugged themselves.

And then I hugged Maya and said, “I love you,” and it wasn't enough to hug themselves -- they all had to hug each other, too!

The teacher really liked the “How Are You” part of the song where we shake hands, and she sent one child up to shake my hand and say, “How are you?” And I answered, “I’m fine, thank you!” Soon all the kids were coming up one at a time to say “How are you,” and “I’m fine, thank you!”

The kids were just so sweet! The teacher told me later that the little girl above told her that “Maya’s mama is so beautiful!” LOL! On the playground, the little girl was stroking my arm and saying something about my skin, but of course I have no idea what.

Zoe and Maya were very excited to show Mimi their classrooms. Maya showed Mimi where her washcloth hangs in the bathroom, and where her cup is kept, and the space where she sleeps

So Zoe also had to show off her nap space. (Zoe informs us that the teacher has moved her to a different bed. Why, I asked. Not surprisingly, "Because I was playing with my friend next to me and keeping her awake." ALL of Zoe's previous teachers will understand this, since she has ALWAYS been moved for exactly the same reason!).

Mimi was suitably impressed, and was also very impressed with how bright and cheerful the kindergarten is. There are decorations everywhere, including on the landings of the staircases.

After our English lesson, but before class was dismissed for the day, we went out to the playground with the kids. Zoe’s class was also down on the lower playground – I had not been down there before, but Mimi went down to take pictures and reports that there is actually a swimming pool (without water!) down there! Zoe always yearns to go to the lower playground, but it is frequently locked. So she was excited to have an opportunity today.

Maya and I stayed on the upper playground – the usual courtyard playground you’ve already seen pictures of. Maya loved showing me the toys that are usually put away when we play there in the late afternoon after pick-up time.

I was interacting with several of the kids, one of whom kept calling me "teacher" in Chinese. One child brought me a “flower” – a weed he had pulled from the grass. I said, “Thank you,” and soon ALL the kids were pulling up weeds and giving them to me!

The little girl in the orange jumper seemed really shy during class, and didn’t say anything or sing any of the songs. And then she sat by herself instead of playing with the other kids. But she also ran to pull weeds for me, and gave me the sweetest smiles when I said “Thank you.”

School was then over for the day, and we walked home.

(I’ve been meaning to mention the building you can see to the left in the photo, just behind the blue fence. It has been under construction since we got here – the outside seems done, except for the windows, and the workers are working on the interior. Just about the entire country of China is under construction. And most of the construction is done by migrant workers – people who come to the big city from rural areas to find jobs. They live in the buildings as they are building them, and you can see clothes hanging to dry from the open windows. This crew has at least one family working and living there – we frequently see a woman and a little boy on the second floor of the building as we walk by. Of course, the building does not yet have electricity or water, so it must be a very hard life.)

Whew! An exhausting day all around! Even the girls seemed tired out, going to sleep easily after a bedtime story from Mimi.

Looks like Zoe conked out before the story was finished! I'm surprised that Mimi didn't, since jetlag woke her up at 3:00 a.m. today. But if keeping busy and staying on local time gets you over jetlag quickly, Mimi will be over it in no time -- because at the pace we're setting, there's no way she can fall asleep during the day! Nighty-night, everyone!

Mimi's Trip

Here’s Mimi’s account of her long journey:

The trip was long but not as tiring as I had anticipated. I arrived at DFW airport 3 hours before my flight for two reasons. One was that I wanted to beat the rush hour, and the second is that I always arrive early anywhere. My mother used to tell me that I must have swallowed a clock when I was a baby! I hate to be late anywhere. Of course I lost my ice cold bottle of water right away since I could not pass it at security. I bought one and sat at my gate and read, I walked, listened to my music and before I know it we were on our way. Since we were only about 50 passengers on this flight, the flight attendants threw not one but two minuscule packets of peanuts toward the little table, catch it if you can! Service left a lot to be desired.

In San Francisco I walked from one side of the building to the international departures. I did not walk very fast since I had plenty of time and it took me 20 minutes. I then stood in line to get a boarding pass and went to the gate. I lost my second bottle of water since I could not have it past security, so bought another. What a racket, $2.40 for a small bottle. I was a bit apprehensive about the long flight since this is the first time I was in coach for such a long flight and I wondered how comfortable it was going to be. I was on a row of 3 seats and the middle one was empty, so it was ample space. As I was in the waiting room I figured out that there were approximately 70% Asians, 28% Hindus, and 2% Anglos. I wondered how chaotic the boarding was going to be with all these people waiting. Singapore airline did a fabulous job boarding, it was fast and orderly. I think Air France could take lessons from Singapore Airline. Last October when I was in Paris with about 3 or 4 hundred passengers, it was mass chaos to board that large plane.

The beautiful flight attendants wore gorgeous uniforms. They were a pretty print almost a paisley but not quite, a long skirt with a border and a matching short sleeve jacket. They were not all the same color but complemented each others. All through the flight the service was superb. We had a rather good dinner (for airline food) at almost 4:00 am. Dallas time and I was ready for a meal. All through the night the flight attendants were offering cold water or orange juice, cookies, or apples. I drank a lot of water therefore I walked a lot to queue for the lavatories! I got my exercise this way. I slept about 3 hours, then listened to my favorite classical music for another 3 hours where I was not asleep but so very relaxed that I rested well. We had another meal they called “pre-landing” meal. I chose the western one since I could not stomach noodles and broccoli, nor curry something this early in the morning.

We arrive early in the morning in Hong Kong. I walked from the international arrival to domestic departures. It took a while but signs were easy to read. I had to go up on escalators and down more escalators and then take the automatic train, then up more @#$% escalators, then walk and walk to the furthest gate for my next flight. It was good to walk though.

Of course I had to throw away my second bottle of water to go though security. I did not have any HK money but they were glad to take US $. That bottle was the least expensive I bought. It was $1.40. They had to give me change in HK money. That’s fine, I will use it for my water bottle on my way back home.
The flight to Xiamen was not full. There were more Anglos in that flight and that surprised me. I didn’t expect to see so many going there. The flight was short and going through passport control and custom was painless. I was so glad to see my suitcase. Malinda and the girls were there with a welcoming sign. I was so happy to see my girls!

Mimi's Here!

We picked Mimi up at the airport after her long flight with no trouble -- and she says her flights were no trouble at all. I'll have her post about her flight experiences later on when she's more rested. The girls were so excited this morning to go get Mimi -- I distracted them with the sign-making project, but they could hardly wait to leave for the airport.

As you can see from these pictures, Mimi looks pretty chipper after the long flight, and she was as excited as the girls to join up with us.

The girls immediately had to tell Mimi EVERYTHING that has happened to them in the last 2 months, and Zoe has been seriously instructing her on all things Chinese: "Mimi, you can't sit 'like this' (with foot on knee) because it's rude to show the bottom of your foot to people, but it isn't rude to stare, so you can do that."

We took Mimi to lunch at Lin Duck House, where she had a well-deserved beer -- I know, she doesn't even like beer! But it's the one guaranteed cold drink in China! After lunch, we let Mimi sleep for an hour, and then we've been keeping her awake with a walk to the park and making her read bedtime stories to the girls. She says she feel surprisingly good after the long flights. But we'll let her go to bed soon, and hopefully getting on China time quickly will make the jetlag pass quickly.

Mimi's Coming!

The girls are so excited that their Mimi -- my mom -- is coming to visit for a month. She arrives around 11 this morning. It was all I could do to get the girls to sleep last night since they were bouncing off the walls, and actually bouncing on the beds, singing, "Mimi's coming, Mimi's coming!"

We'll take the bus to the airport to meet her, and then take a cab back home since it might be hard to manage her bags on the bus. I know Mimi always packs light, but I gave her a shopping list of things to bring us so it won't be quite as light as usual this time.

Actually, our shopping list was pretty short, since we can find most everything we want here. She's bringing Shout or Spray & Wash -- cold-water washing doesn't do much for stain-removal. And the girls don't know it yet, but she's bringing microwave popcorn. And I'm excited that she's bringing me some English-language books! You can find books in English here, if you're not a picky reader (which I am). The International Bookstore near us has one book case of English books, and if you're eager to read the Unauthorized Biography of Tonya Harding, the Story of Bronze (yes, exactly what it sounds like), or anything by Judith Kranz, you'll be happy with the selection. Xinhua Bookstore has an impressive collection of classics, so if you want to re-read Ivanhoe or the Scarlet Letter, you're set. But there is little in the way of cheesy, modern, fun reading.

Anyway, we'll post when Mimi gets here, and let you know how her long trip went.

Giving Birth in China

Our downstairs neighbors at the Foreign Scholars Guest House are a young couple with a 10-week-old baby. He is Canadian/Dutch and she is Russian -- and an amazing woman for having given birth in China. The girls are completely enamoured of baby Jonathan, and Zoe frequently reminds Maya not to jump up and down on the floor for fear of scaring the baby below! When I met the mom for the first time and discovered she was our downstairs neighbor, I had to apologize profusely for all the noise we make over her head!

We’ve talked several times about her experience giving birth in China. I’m very interested because I think it’s possible – for complicated reasons – that Maya was born in a hospital, though Zoe was likely born at home. So I’ve been picking her brain about her experiences.

First of all, she says her experience was not the normal Chinese hospital experience, since she gave birth in a center run by a Japanese-Chinese consortium. But there were some aspects of it that were uniquely Chinese – like the food. No, it wasn’t typical Chinese food like you’d find anywhere in China. She was given medicinal foods – the Chinese have a strong belief in the health aspects of various foods. And she says the food was AWFUL! Oh, well, that’s hospital food everywhere, right?!

She said the most frustrating thing about the whole experience is that no one would give her information – even when they spoke English. The doctor would come in to check on her during labor, she’d ask a direct question like, “How far along am I?” And the doctor would completely ignore it and walk out! (This is actually VERY Chinese!). Even during prenatal visits she couldn’t get her doctor to answer basic questions, though the doctor’s English was impeccable. And then of course there were communications problems because of limited English, as well. She said after the delivery she had a cold, so was asking about some medication for her stuffy nose and scratchy throat, and was supplementing her questions with the kind of sign language/mime you do with limited English speakers. The nurse finally showed recognition of the problem – and then brought her a roll of toilet paper so she could blow her nose!

She had several ultrasounds during the pregnancy, but no one would reveal the sex of the baby. In fact, it’s against the law in China to tell – although abortion is legal in China, abortion for the purpose of sex-selection is illegal. And legislators fear that, given the social preference for boys, if parents learn that the fetus is a girl they will abort. (She was finally able to find out the ultrasound results after filling out reams of paperwork since the law apparently doesn’t apply to foreigners. She also said she was kind of hoping for a girl, and the girl’s name they had picked out was . . . ZOE!)

During her labor, she was in a labor room . . . in February . . . with ALL the windows wide open! She was sweating like crazy because of the exertion (that’s why they call it labor, right?!) and freezing at the same time. (That’s what probably led to that stuffy nose and scratchy throat). And then in her hospital room, it was incredibly hot and airless and no one would open a window because the baby was rooming in. She said that having the baby in the room with her was definitely a privilege of being in this special birthing center. Most hospitals don’t allow rooming-in, and the babies are kept in a separate nursery.

She was in the hospital for three days, a typical length of stay. She was lucky, she said, that there were no complications and everything went smoothly. And Jonathan is certainly an adorable child! And he has a very brave mama!

Xiamen Firefighters

We walked to school today – and found out that there wasn’t school after all! Apparently we were supposed to go to school last Sunday to make up for THIS Monday! Sigh.

But I guess we were meant to be walking home from school at that time -- as we walked we saw three red fire trucks parked at the curb near the park in front of Xiada’s administration building (I’m a traditionalist when it comes to fire trucks, so I’m glad Xiamen fire trucks are red instead of the boring white ones we have at home in Fort Worth!). Note that the emergency number to call the fire department is 119! In the park we came upon a group of firefighters running drills in their bright green uniforms.

The object of the drill seemed to be to connect several lengths hose on the run. One firefighter took off carrying two rolls of hose. After he traveled about two hose-lengths, he dropped the end of one hose and then hooked the other hose to the other end as he ran on. The other firefighter also had two rolls of hose, but he didn’t run right away. He hooked one hose to the hydrant connection, then ran after the first firefighter. He also hooked his two hoses together as he ran, and then hooked them to the other firefighter’s hose.

It was all very impressive. Except when the firefighters dropped the hoses while trying to connect them or missed the connection altogether or tripped over their own feet! One firefighter did all three, and the squad leader (marked by the presence of a walkie-talkie) was obviously frustrated with him. He was chewing him out in Chinese, and pointed to the man’s untied shoe lace. When the bumbler bent down to tie his shoe lace, the squad leader hit him on the head with his helmet (three times!) – good thing the bumbler was wearing a helmet!

The squad did the same drill over and over, meticulously rolling up the hoses again and again.We watched for about an hour, and then the hardworking men in green got to take a break after ceremoniously removing their helmets.

Most sat or stood about, but several pulled out cameras and started taking pictures of each other! Do you think they might be new recruits, as impressed as we were by their bright green uniforms?! One asked me to pose for a picture with him – of course. So I asked him to reciprocate!

Maya has long said she wants to be a firefighter when she grows up. Watching all that hard work didn't change her mind -- she STILL says she wants to be a firefighter!

Shopping Zhongshan Lu

We went shopping today – ostensibly to buy bed pillows since Mimi is coming to visit and we don’t have enough pillows to go around. We headed for Zhongshan Lu (Lu = street) and Trust-Mart, the Chinese version of Wal-Mart. (Trust-Mart is actually on Siming Nan Lu (Nan = South), but the bus stops just past Zhongshan Lu, and you have to walk back two blocks). We decided to wander down Zhongshan Lu first – it is one of the main shopping streets in Xiamen and this portion of the street is closed to automobile traffic. That makes it fun to wander and window-shop. There are statues, like the one above, as well as shops. But mostly Zhongshan Lu is about the shopping. So we SHOPPED!

We found the coolest little shop on Zhongshan Lu that sells clothing inspired by ethnic minority costumes. While the principal ethnic group in China is Han, there are something like 55 recognized minority groups in China, many of them in the south of China. (This site gives lots of great info about the various minority groups.)

Zoe and Maya are from Guangxi Province, which is majority minority – principally Zhuang, Dong, Yi, and Miao peoples. In fact, Guangxi isn’t even a province, it is officially the Guangxi Zhuang Autonomous Region (The Chinese Constitution provides for self-government by minority peoples, and that is accomplished in 5 "autonomous" regions, including Tibet, and we know just how autonomous Tibet is!).

It’s highly likely that Zoe belongs to one of the minority groups, though Maya’s features seem to be Han. Anyway, I’m a sucker for the elaborate costumes of the various minority groups – I have a Miao jacket hanging on my wall at home, I bought a Zhuang pleated skirt and a Yi headdress during my last trip to Guangxi Province. So I was excited to see this shop.

The blue outfit is inspired by Zhuang costumes – the pleated skirt and elaborate embroidery are the key elements. This is what drew me into the shop. Aren’t they adorable?! And then the girls HAD to have these Korean-inspired dresses (Korean is considered an ethnic minority group in China because a community exists inside the Chinese border and has for centuries) because yellow is Zoe’s favorite color and Maya loves butterflies.

The ladies at the shop were really sweet and helpful, though they did not speak any English. The hardest thing to convey to them was that I wanted TWO of each outfit -- I guess matching "sister dresses" are not that common in China (for obvious reasons!). As we were about to leave the shop, Maya noticed a Santa mask hanging on the wall and pointed it out to me. Immediately the shopkeeper took it down and gave it to Maya! So the other sales person went to find Zoe a present – a headband with bobbing snowmen! So Merry Christmas in May! We walked down the street with the snowmen bobbing away, and Maya asked me, "Why is everyone laughing at us?" Well, it wasn't because we were out-of-season for snowmen -- you see Christmas decorations up year-round in China!

We’ll definitely be going back to this shop – there were many other intriguing items, including the cutest baby-sized Mongolian felt boots. I’m already regretting not getting them to go with my growing Chinese shoes collection (tiger shoes, worn by children to scare off tigers; tiny shoes for bound feet; the satin embroidered mary janes Maya was wearing when we met. . .).

We did other shopping, too. The girls picked out little 2-yuan beaded bracelets in one shop. And then we found this dress for Maya at the Printemps Department Store, and the complementary dress for Zoe at the Laiya Department Store. And the shoes are from Trust-Mart. Zoe was excited by the shoes – “These are my first shoes we bought in China!” So she deemed them her birthday present, since today is her half-birthday (I can’t believe she’s 6 and a HALF!). Definitely a child after my own heart -- more excited about the shoes than the jewelry!

As is our family tradition, since this is Zoe's half-birthday, she got to pick where we went out to dinner. And of course she picked McDonald's (blech!). We ended up getting take-out since there were no free tables, and took our food to the grounds of Nanputuo Temple for a picnic. Boy, you feel guilty eating chicken nuggets and fish sandwiches under the eyes of vegetarian Buddhist monks! I felt oddly compelled to make a donation before leaving the temple!

So we spent our last day of Golden Week spreading some gold around. Tomorrow it is back to school, and to work to earn more gold. And don’t worry, Mimi, we bought pillows, so you’re all set!

Four Seasons Art Project

The girls are getting quite blog-conscious -- when we finished Maya's art project she asked if we could post it to the blog for Mimi and Grandpa to see!

On the last day of school before break, Maya's teacher gave us a large piece of paper and said that Chen Xing's mom would explain what to do -- that's my helpful English-speaking parent. We were to make some kind of picture having to do with nature or the environment. Maya could draw it, or we could cut out pictures from magazines. And it would be ok for Zoe to help. Sounds simple, right?

Of course I had to make it complicated -- the summer picture has real sand and shells glued on. The spring tree is real bark. We never did find any construction paper, so all the paper here is actually wrapping paper -- except for the "snow," which is toilet paper, as I'm sure you can tell! We had quite a flurry of itsy-bitsy pieces of paper in the apartment. But we had fun doing it, including the nature walks to get sand and bark and to observe palm trees to figure out how to make the trunk look right!

And since it rained ALL DAY yesterday, we had plenty of opportunity to create our masterpiece -- we only left the apartment once all day, and that was just to go down to the lobby of the apartment building to kick the ball around. (I actually saw our porter MOVE -- he played catch with Zoe (but stayed seated the whole time!)).

Carnival!

No, we haven't moved to Rio -- it wasn't that kind of carnival! A carnival has sprung up near Xiada for Golden Week. Remember the “circus” that Zoe saw on her field trip? Well, we found it. The highlight for me was the view from the top of the ferris wheel, but Zoe and Maya named as their favorites, “Everything!”

We started out on the carousel, a double decker one – I’ve never before seen a carousel with two levels! Maya announced that she wanted to ride in the “BEAUTIFUL carriage” as we were standing in line.

Zoe started out in the carriage, but spied a panda next to it and jumped ship.

Next stop the ferris wheel! This was obviously the star attraction of the carnival – it’s the only ride where we had to stand in line for any appreciable time. But it wasn’t long before they were cramming us and 3 others into a car only big enough for 4 people!

As you can tell from the photo, Maya and Zoe were a little nervous at first. Zoe was very solicitous of Maya, because "Maya, you've never been this high before, but it's ok." But Zoe was just as nervous -- I could tell because she was sucking her "comfort finger." I told Zoe that Maya had been that high before -- even higher on the airplane -- and so had she. That seemed to do the trick, and soon they warmed up to this new experience and were eagerly looking around.

The door to our conveyance clanged shut, and then up we go!

Being situated near the shore, we got great views of the water, the boats, and GulangYu (Yu = island) just offshore.

In the other direction we could see Xiada (the white wing-like thing is the stadium, and you can see the tall main administration building to the right of it) and Five-Old-Man Mountain.

Outside Xiada is mostly residential areas, so the tall buildings you see here are apartments.

The view straight down was actually my favorite, because the brightly-striped carnival tents made such a pretty picture.

This one, shot straight down from the highest point on the ferris wheel, doesn't even look real!

The girls rode a few more rides after the ferris wheel – a swinging pirate ship, little boats . . .

. . . and airplanes complete with machine guns to shoot down the enemy (why are we so blood-thirsty here?!)

Then a close encounter with a clown, and we were out of tokens and ready to go.

While the girls were riding their rides, some of the carnival workers would talk to me, eager for a chance to speak English. Most of them are from the Phillipines, traveling all over Asia with the carnival. One was excited to hear we were from Texas since he has an aunt in Dallas – he says his aunt wants him to come to Texas when he finishes his schooling, but he is too busy traveling to finish school. The carnival rides seemed safer -- newer and better maintained -- than most rides of the type we find in China. At least I didn't feel we were risking death as we rode each ride!

We left the carnival just in time – rain started spitting on us just as we were leaving. We ducked into Lin Duck House on our way home for a hearty lunch and to avoid the rain. And then home again.

What a busy morning! We left our apartment around 9:30, and were back by 1:30. And in that time we discovered new places at Xiada, found the beach, enjoyed a carnival, and ate fried squid and clams at one of our favorite restaurants. A golden day in Golden Week!

Finding the Sea and So Much More!

When we went on the mountain-climbing trip with the law school, we returned to Xiada on the Island Ring Road that parallels the beach. It seemed to me that there was a way to the beach, and the stone sea wall along the beach, other than through Beach Gate. So we decided to find that alternate route today. We also found many interesting sights along the way.

Yes, it’s true – the Chinese use bamboo for scaffolding. That stuff is STRONG!

Throughout campus we find these stones buried in the ground. I have no idea what they signify, but we found the source today!

The girls had fun posing in front of any vaguely interesting object – if you can figure out how to make them STOP doing the #@%$ peace sign, let me know!

Our trek was successful – we did find the ocean and the sea wall!

The water came all the way up to the wall for most of the length of the wall, but in one area there was a beach and a handy staircase down to the sand. I stayed on the seawall, blissfuly sand-free, while the girls walked barefoot from one staircase to another.

The girls weren’t too interested in staying on the beach, because we could see in the near distance a ferris wheel – and we had to check it out.

Next installment – the carnival!

Dinner with Si Bo's Family

We had a wonderful evening yesterday – we were invited to dinner at Si Bo’s home (remember Si Bo, pictured above, from our law school excursions?). Si Bo and his mother, Han, met us in front of Xiada kindergarten to lead us to their apartment. They took us there by a round-about way, and I didn’t realize until we left how close we were to the law school!

The Apartment

Their fourth-floor apartment was really nice. We entered a white-tiled living room, which they had set up as a combined living/dining room. Through an archway with built-in display cabinets was another room next to the kitchen that was supposed to serve as a dining room, but they left it empty so that Si Bo would have more room for play. The apartment had 3 bedrooms, each with wood laminate flooring. Each bedroom had a conventional bed – not the platform/rattan mat you find in many homes in China. One bedroom was set up as a home office, with desk top and lap top computers. Si Bo also had a computer in his room. And the beds had mosquito-netting tents. There were two bathrooms – one with a squat toilet and the other with a western toilet AND bidet! They had every modern convenience you could wish for – in addition to the three computers I’ve already mentioned, they had two TVs, an electronic keyboard, a treadmill, a rowing machine, air conditioning and washing machine. The kitchen was small, with the same two-burner gas stove top I have, but they supplemented that with a microwave, electric rice cooker and electric hotplate.

I didn’t ask, but Han told me that they pay 2,000 yuan a month in rent – that’s about $250.00. They rent the apartment from a Xiada faculty member who owns it. About 5 years ago, Xiada allowed faculty to buy their apartments rather than rent them from the school. Han says they’ve all been purchased now, and some faculty managed to buy more than one apartment and now rent them out. She also said that they find it difficult to pay so much rent.

When I was telling my parents about our evening, my dad asked if the family would be considered rich in China to have such a nice apartment and so many consumer goods. I’d put them firmly in the middle class – that is, if China has classes, which it doesn’t (remember? The revolution of 1949 was to end class distinctions?!). Han was telling me that the new apartment buildings near the law school, but off Xiada campus, would rent for more than 10,000 yuan a month. Only rich people could live there, she said.

Han also cleared up a few mysteries for us – yes, all primary school children come home for lunch. The campus is always over-run with children from about 11-2:30, and I wondered if everyone came home or only some. There are no meals served at school after kindergarten grade, and parents come home to cook full meals for the kids! And the men who ride around the residential areas on bicycles yelling something are collecting heavy recycling or are offering to fix things in the apartments.

The Food

Han’s husband cooked while we talked, and what a spread they put on! All told, I counted 14 dishes: 1) duck, bought specially because I mentioned that Maya loved duck during one of our bus-ride conversations; 2) noodles, because I mentioned it was Zoe’s favorite; 3) rice, because I mentioned it was Maya’s favorite; 3) pork dumplings; 4) fried chicken wings; 5) fish with black beans; 6) tofu in a hot sauce; 7) sautéed cucumbers; 8) snow peas; 9) Chinese broccoli; 10) American broccoli; 11) an egg-and-leek dish; 12) soup with radish; 13) another vegetable I didn’t recognize (and Han didn’t even know the name of it in Chinese since it doesn’t grow in her home province); 14) vegetable dumplings. Oh, and after, we had watermelon, so I guess that counts as 15 dishes! And it was all wonderful! There were so many vegetable dishes because I had mentioned in that same bus conversation that I really enjoyed all the fresh vegetables in China.

They were really embarrassed because in the middle of cooking all of this they ran out of gas and had to call to have another tank delivered. So they plied us with snacks and more snacks, and the girls did not do justice to the meal. Maya ate nothing but duck, and Zoe was too interested in playing with Si Bo, who inhaled his food and left the table. To compensate, I ate WAY more than I should have – good thing there was a long walk home!

Playing

The girls loved playing with Si Bo. Zoe brought her Leapster, and Si Bo enjoyed playing with that, and then showed Zoe some games on his computer. He also showed us that he is learning to write Chinese calligraphy with ink and brush. They do not teach calligraphy in school anymore, I’m told, so children go to lessons outside school. Si Bo also takes swim lessons and piano lessons, and played for us on the electronic keyboard.

He has a race track for cars in the apartment and a remote-control car, so there were many races going on. But by far the most entertaining play for them was chasing each other from room to room with guns. Si Bo kept getting in trouble for locking the doors, and Zoe kept getting in trouble (with me at least – Han was too nice to do anything but laugh) for slamming doors. And Maya mostly lolled on the bed and watched TV! They definitely wore each other out, because the girls slept until 8:30 this morning, which is completely out of character for my early risers.

The Conversation

Han and I had lots to talk about, and in many ways the conversation was just like those I have with working moms in the U.S. – how to balance work and family and the challenges of raising kids. And we shared the same lament as most professors – how to balance teaching and scholarship (research and writing).

Han said that at Xiada, publishing books and articles is considered more important than teaching, and the only way to get promoted is to publish. She’s recently published a book about the WTO, for example. Her husband teaches at another university in Xiamen, and she says that publishing isn’t quite as important there. She also said they were very fortunate to find jobs in the same city – a frequent problem for academic couples in the U.S. as well. In fact, they lived apart for a number of years for reasons of work. She came to Xiada in 2003 to work on a Ph.D., after having taught for several years at home, and her husband and Si Bo stayed behind in their hometown near Shanghai. Si Bo and his dad have only been in Xiamen for a year.

Han asked me if it was hard to raise children in the U.S. How to answer that? Yes, but so many people do it without really thinking about it. Is it hard in China? Yes, she said, because it is so expensive. I hear this from lots of parents, that raising children is financially draining. (It seems to be an underpinning of the one-child policy, that it is too expensive to have more than one child, and not because of the fine for over-quota children but just because things are expensive.) So what is so expensive, I asked? Schooling for one thing – there is no free public schooling in China. And it is also considered important to do extra things like calligraphy lessons.

And the other hard part, Han said, was knowing how to do the right things to make sure your child grows up to be “a productive member of society.” I thought that was interesting – I think parents in America would agree that they want their children to be productive members of society. But I think we are probably more likely to say first that we want our children to grow up to be happy.

We talked quite a bit about the one-child policy (or one-family, one-child policy as it is called here), because I’m interested for obvious reasons. Han confirmed what I understood about the policy – that in rural areas it is a two-child policy if your first child is a girl, but in urban areas it is a fairly strict one-child policy. If you have twins, however, you need not pay a fine for over-quota birth. We’ve actually seen quite a few twins here, and Han said that some families use reproductive technologies to have twins. (I guess that explains the Xiamen Clinic for Infertility and Reproductive Health that we pass on the bus on the way to Zhongshan Park). Wouldn’t it be cheaper to just pay the fine for over-quota births? Yes, Han said, but there are other consequences to having extra children. It seems there is social pressure to conform, and it might affect your ability to get promotions at work.

Han would really like to have more children, but she says there is no way they can afford it. She also disagrees with the one-child policy because she thinks it will create many problems in the future. She thinks that the gender imbalance means that men are going to have to look abroad to find wives.

She said that Zoe and Maya are “famous” at the law school, and that one professor is now considering adopting a second child now that her daughter is in college! Isn’t that amazing?! Han also asked me if there were many “bachelors” – meaning single women – who adopt children in America! Apparently, one of the things that make Zoe and Maya so famous at the law school is that everyone is amazed at how independent they are. Han asked me if all children in America were so independent, and I said I thought it had more to do with different parents’ ideas about child-rearing and the children’s inherent personalities. I think Zoe and Maya are independent because they’ve had to be – being a single mom sometimes means I can’t do everything for them, so they have learned to do for themselves.

We were ultimately at their house for 6 hours, so I’m sure there’s a lot more we talked about that I cannot remember. I’ll post more about it if it comes to me!

It was wonderful to be invited to their home – they are such a nice family and I learned much about family life in China. We came bearing gifts, of course, since we had been invited to dinner, but they gave us gifts as well. Han got the girls beaded necklaces, and can you believe she actually managed to find a beautiful silk nightgown that is actually big enough to fit me! The best gift of all was their friendship.

Scenes from Chinese TV

I thought folks might be interested in seeing what there is to see on Chinese TV. We have what you'd think of as "Basic Cable" here; there are lots more things available on TV in China, including via satellite. But what we have is the usual government-run channels. The only English channel basically runs travelogues and financial news, and that's about it. The Cheetohs ad above is actually from one of the Chinese channels. You definitely see things on Chinese TV that you'd see on screens in the U.S., like ads for American products. . . .

. . . and then there are the things you are unlikely to see on U.S. TV -- like Peking opera. The girls actually love watching Chinese opera. If you've never seen it, it is very stylized, ornately costumed, and sung (if you can call it that!) in a high-pitched whine that is definitely an acquired taste. Think Betty Boop in Chinese! Maya, who is cursed/blessed with the cutest little Betty-Boop voice, thinks all the singers have such pretty voices!

This commercial is a hoot -- drink the right stuff and you'll get the pretty girl. But instead of drinking beer, the actor drinks fruit juice!

This is an ad for shampoo, of course. But it could easily have been a news story instead -- I watched a story on the English channel about a successful attempt in Shanghai to get into the Guinness Book of World Records by having the biggest group of women doing "the hair-tossing dance" together. And yes, there was video! I was doubled over in laughter, so missed the screen grab.

You see lots of earnest interviews with scientists and factory heads on Chinese TV. I don't know what it's all about, but it seems geared to impress with China's enormous economic growth and scientific progress. I was pleased to see that the scientist worthy of being interviewed was a woman!

A lot of the offerings for kids and for grownups are historical. This cartoon is about a warrior fighting the Mongol hordes -- very Mulan-esque. The girls love it! But their favorite cartoon is by far one of the "Monkey King" offerings. There are LOTS of shows about the Monkey King -- both live-action and animated.

There are lots of musical variety shows on TV, too. Some are live concerts, usually with huge production numbers that involve dozens of costumed dancers. This lady sang in the midst of male dancers in red costumes . . . and then came the horses stampeding across the stage! I missed that screen grab, I'm sorry to say. A lot of the shows are amateurs -- a version of "Chinese Idol" it seems, with famous judges and everything. Apparently there was one show a few seasons back that included call-in voting that was so popular the national government stepped in and put a stop to it -- afraid that folks might get to like voting a little too much!

Most of the shows are dramas of the soap opera variety. This is one of the few sit-coms I've seen. And I know it's a sit-com because it has a laugh track, not because I can understand a word being said! Why is it shot with the couch in the middle of the scene? Who knows?! This scene, as far as I can tell, has the neighbor with the little girl complaining to the parents of the little boy that the boy has been getting fresh with the girl. The parents are explaining/apologizing, and promising good behavior, while the little boy periodically shouts "I love you" (in English) to the little girl. Hilarity ensues.

Ah, Tide, Chinese style!

Here are the hosts of a game show -- get a load of their clothes! There aren't a lot of game shows, but most of them seem pretty yawn-inducing. This was a kind of "Price is Right" show, with audience members called down to play. While I watched, they were guessing the price of a white wedding gown (white wedding gowns are increasingly popular in China, despite the fact that white is traditionally associated with mourning).

This is the incredibly annoying host of a cartoon show the kids like. Her attire and behavior would be appropriate for a 5-year-old, but in an adult it is just plain weird! Kind of PeeWee Herman on Midol.

Ahh, another highly dramatic music show. High drama is definitely favored by Chinese TV viewers, if the number of soul-stirring offerings are any guide.

And this show seems to combine all the favorites -- period costumes, history, and soap-opera drama! There are lots of these historical soaps -- sort of Peking Opera without the singing!

Hope you've found this Chinese version of TV Guide illuminating. Watching enough to take these photos pretty much killed my desire to watch any more Chinese TV! But then, I'm not that fond of American TV, either . . . .

How to Move to China

Not really – I don’t know enough to tell folks how to move to China. But I’ve gotten lots of comments and email questions asking me how I did it because the writer is interested in doing it, too. Most are the parents of Chinese adoptees, some are lawyers, and some are teachers. My experience may not be typical, but I thought I’d try to explain a little about why and how I did it, and give what few suggestions I have.

But first I have to explain that I’m a wimp about discomfort. Yes, I love to travel and loved my three short trips to China. But I like air conditioning, room service, ice in my drinks, Western toilets, and being able to read street signs. I knew I’d be giving all that up when moving to China. In fact, I remember when I first visited China in 1991 that I had never felt more FOREIGN and incompetent in my life. Living abroad was definitely on my mind then, since I was visiting my old college roommate in Singapore on that trip as well. I thought, I would NEVER live in China – though Hong Kong struck me as doable as an expat.

Still, as much as I love a Route 44 cherry limeade from Sonic, with all that crushed ice (ahhhhh!), I love my children more. They are really the reason I’m here. And I know that’s what is motivating all those adoptive parents who are thinking about leaving their comfort zone to live in China. But I’m not claiming martyrdom, sacrificing all for my children. I’m having an absolute BLAST here! And 5 months isn't exactly living in China -- it's more like an extended vacation. But having a job and an apartment and kids in school makes it feel like living in China!

The idea of living in China for a time started to seem like a good idea in December 2004. Zoe had just turned 4, and seemed to have something of a racial identity crisis starting. We were in the checkout line at Target when she suddenly said, “I wish my skin was light.” Wow, way too young for that, I thought. Later that month she refused to see an African-American Santa at a store. I thought it was Santa fear, but later that day she told me out of the blue, “I don’t want to see a Santa who has skin like mine.” When she got a Mulan doll for Christmas she excitedly exclaimed, “Look, she has black hair like mine!” But then she said dismissively, “But her skin is light.” Oooooookay! Houston, we have a problem. How are we going to deal with this?

The first thing I did was sign Zoe up for Chinese School on Saturday afternoons. I wanted her to interact with more adult Chinese, and I wanted her to know Chinese kids who were NOT adopted (for a while there I think she believed that being Chinese and being adopted were synonymous!) I wanted her to experience a world where she was in the majority, not the minority. And Chinese School was a huge success – she loved it!

About that time I got a blast email to faculty from a colleague, a former Fulbrighter, saying that the deadline for applying for a Fulbright grant to teach in China had been extended. Hmmmm. [You can read all about the Fulbright program by clicking on the link to the right of this blog.]

I started thinking about the logistics of such a plan – could I take leave from work? How could I afford it? What would I do with my house? How would this work when I had a second adoption in the works, and would be heading to China, as a single parent, with TWO children? I decided I’d figure out the answers to those questions IF I got the grant, so I started filling out the application. I think I was half-hoping I wouldn’t be selected. And since I needed three references, I had to tell some folks that I was applying. And they all treated me like I had lost my mind! How would I, a single parent of two, manage in China?!

In the meantime, we came to China in March 2005 for Maya’s adoption. Zoe was a great traveler, making a long sojourn in China seem less insane than it sounded. And Maya adjusted beautifully to all the changes in her life, showing herself to have the same flexible personality as big sister. Maybe I wasn’t so crazy after all . . . .

Well, I did get the award, and started making plans to go to China in February 2006 (yes, 2006!).

Plans were going swimmingly. I made arrangements at work to be on leave, the Fulbright grant was generous enough for me to afford two households – one in the U.S. and one in China (you still have to pay the mortgage even if you’re not living there!). I planned simply to close up the house and have my parents check on it periodically.

You know that expression, "Life is what happens when you're making other plans"? I went to the doctor on Dec. 19, 2005, with a persistent cough, and a chest x-ray showed pulmonary nodules that looked like metastatic cancer (meaning it looked like cancer from somewhere else that had moved to my lungs, not like primary lung cancer). So off we went on a search for the primary site of the alleged cancer. I was CT-scanned, PAP-ed, mammo-ed, ultrasounded, needle biopsied, PET-scanned, surgical-biopsied . . . . and no cancer! But it took three months to find that out. And somehow the Fulbright people thought maybe it wasn’t wise to head to China in the midst of all that: “Umm. So you want to go to China, even though the pulmonary nodules might be cancer, and you'll just need a CT scan there in 3 months, and if they've grown, you'll need a biopsy of your lungs, and if it's cancer, you'll need to come home in the middle of the grant period? We don't think so!” But the Fulbright folks really were terrific – arranging to extend my grant to this academic year without my having to reapply.

And the one-year delay was really a blessing. Maya’s being older and fully potty-trained has made it SOOO much easier this year than it would have been last. And I think being home for two years instead of just one before returning to China has been best for her, too. Zoe is also older and more mature, and had one more year of Chinese School under her belt. And I am far healthier – though I didn’t have cancer, I did have bronchitis and a sinus infection that took 5 rounds of antibiotics to kill. And my new pulminologist discovered that I had sleep apnea – no wonder I was exhausted, I was waking up at night 30 times AN HOUR! Now that that is being treated, I’m a new woman. Plus, this year my nephew and his girlfriend were able to come down from Vermont and live in my house, which is good for my house and good for my parents to have relatives close by now that I’m out of the country.

So that’s how I did it, easy as pie. Being qualified for the Fulbright grant really made it extremely easy, because it is a well-run, well-organized group that brings at least 25 scholars to China a year (as well as thousands to other countries, too). There are several different Fulbright programs, so you don’t necessarily have to be a University professor to apply. I know they have a program for primary and secondary school teachers and administrators and other professionals.

A lot of people come to China to teach English. For most of those teaching positions there is no requirement that you have an education degree or any experience teaching – they just want native speakers of English. Do an internet search for “teaching English in China” and you’ll find tons of information and organizations (check carefully, I’m not sure which organizations are reliable and which ones aren’t, but it’s a place to start). I know a single mom who came to China with her two kids to teach English and stayed for several years. The nice thing about coming to China with an organized group like Fulbright is that they will help with a work visa and finding housing.

Money is the biggest factor for most people in deciding whether to live and work in China. It certainly was for me. For most positions, like teaching English, the pay is ridiculously low – a monthly salary of 6,000 RMB (about $800 a month) is considered extremely generous for such a position). But it is REMARKABLY cheap to live here – our monthly expenses (which do not include rent and utilities, but do include frequently eating out and lots of shopping, and tuition for Zoe and Maya at school) have been about $350. So, if you’re not carrying a lot of debt at home, you can live comfortably in China on the salary you’d get as an English teacher.

And more and more U.S. companies are doing business in China. Check out some companies in the U.S. with branch offices in China, and take the plunge! The water is nice and warm!

As you can see, I’m no expert, as I warned you. But I will say that coming to China is the best decision I’ve made since the decision to adopt my girls. I see this as a practice run for a longer stay when they are older – I can apply for another Fulbright grant, this one for a full year, in 5 years! And who knows, this might be a great cheap place to retire – I’m pretty sure the girls would come to visit me here!

May Day

Happy May Day! Or, as it is here in China, happy International Labor Day. (Am I right in thinking that we used to make a bigger deal about May Day in the U.S.? Didn’t we dance around the May pole or something? Did we give up May Day so that people wouldn’t think we were communists, sympathizing with the workers?! Or did we come to associate it with disaster -- Mayday! Mayday!) This is the start of “Golden Week,” as this holiday is called. The only thing that seemed to mark it as a holiday for us was that everything was VERY crowded, and the girls didn’t go to school. But to try to make it festive, we did go to the zoo in Zhongshan Park. (The faux dino bones stand in front of the zoo).

Walking through the park to the zoo was an adventure – it was quite crowded, and we ran into two of Maya’s classmates along the way. As we were walking, I distinctly heard a child’s voice yelling, “Maya!” And when Maya saw her classmate, she ran up and gave her a big hug. And then I was amazed that it happened AGAIN! Obviously, the park is the place to go on May Day.

The park has lots of little kiosks selling bubbles, so we passed lots of groups making bubbles. At each group Zoe and Maya had to chase after the bubbles to try to catch them or pop them – always great fun. Everyone was very nice about it, with grownups blowing more and more bubbles just so the girls could keep playing!

The zoo was small, and your typical Chinese zoo. That means no attempt at natural habitats, very small enclosures, and animals not typically found in zoos in the U.S. We saw a pig and a pony, and then there was this exotic animal:

The zoo did have a tiger and a black leopard, a pygmy hippo, and two red pandas [Note to self: when taking pictures of animals behind chain link fence, do not use auto setting. The camera focuses on the fencing, which comes through nice and clear, leaving the animals behind the fence in a blurry fog!]. The most interesting animals were the peacocks. We couldn’t get very close, though, because everyone else found them interesting, too. I always find Chinese zoos depressing, but the girls had a great time.

After the zoo, we stopped for a ride on the carousel, and then watched some performers on roller blades dance to disco music! The girls have been working on copying their moves ever since.

We then left the park and hopped the bus to Wal-Mart – big mistake! Wal-Mart is right next to the train station, and lots of people travel during Golden Week, so the place was packed! We headed straight for the food court in the mall next to Wal-Mart, where I learned a valuable lesson: Look for a table BEFORE buying a huge bowl of noodle soup. It is impossible to move fast enough to snare a table ahead of the other vultures waiting for someone to finish and leave while holding a steaming bowl of noodle soup precariously balanced on a tray! We eventually found a place to perch on the outdoor balcony – a small set of stairs. Lots of people stared as we sat there on the floor, making me empathize with the zoo animals, but at least we all got fed!

On the bus home, the three of us were sitting in the 3-across seats in the front. As the bus got crowded, I put Maya on my lap, as usual, to make room for someone else to sit. Two people tried to sit in that one available seat, and the loser plucked Zoe out of her seat, and then sat down with Zoe on her lap! Zoe was pretty tickled, and proceeded to ignore Maya and me seated next to her. I think it played into her “like a real Chinese girl” fantasy to be seated on the lap of a Chinese woman!

This evening, we checked out the restaurant that shares our apartment building’s courtyard. Although it is the closest restaurant to us, we haven’t been before (mostly because Tian, our waiban, dismissed it as a touristy place). It was quite good! We had abalone steamed in tea, Chinese broccoli, salted chicken served with the head (of course!), and rice. They had a menu with English translations, and there were a number of dishes I’d like to try – and a number of dishes I hope to avoid, like the one called “Local Earthworm Dish!” Here's Zoe with her new friend, Chicken Head! (This did not stop either girl from chowing down and gnawing chicken bones clean!)

Our table was near a small stage, so the girls had to perform. Mrs. Dean, you’ll be glad to know they are both still practicing their ballet, though we seem to dance with more enthusiasm than grace! (But they definitely put the roller-blade dancers to shame!).

We're looking forward to seeing what Day Two of Golden Week has to bring!